An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

Two guys walk into a bar, the third one is a duck.

Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

A black man, a Mexican, and a Jew walk into a bar. The white bartender kills them all because he was a huge racist.

Why did the old man step on the caterpillar? For fun.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Whose there? A chicken.

Who is the richest clown? You're probably thinking Ronald McDonald but its actually Barack Obama

My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

Doctor, Doctor I keep getting pains in the eye when I drink coffee! It's not the coffee, you have a deadly case of ocular melanoma, a form of cancer that affects the eye. You'll be blind within the next 24 hours.

Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

Why did the bunny eat his food

On the last day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... A letter saying she had gone bankrupt, as she had spent all her money buying me 12 pear trees, 35 golden rings, hiring maids and pipers and etc. for over 100 hours, and an innumerable amount of animals.

whats the oposite from anti-jokes? uncle-jokes. LOL

This one time at band camp....I put a flute in it's proper storage compartment.

Women

What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One

Brienna Chladek (515)556-4811. Call me;) anytime I'm a teenager:) xoxo

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

What comes after "Q" R

Where was little suzie the day after the house fire? At the hospital, being treated for minor burns.

roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

why did susie get hit by the bus? cause the bus driver wanted her ice cream

Exactly what?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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