What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his 8th birthday? Prosthetic arms and legs.

a fat black man walks into an aquarium he enjoyed his day viewing many sea animals while buying a souvenier on his way out.

Why did the chicken cross the road it was out of its coop

Why do women where make-up and perfume? because they are ugly and they smell bad.

Herman Cain

What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

Whoa! A talking carrot!

What's big, and fat? Well, duh an elephant.

What's worst than Rick Perry? Two Rick Perrys.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

Why did the sprinter lose the race He had no legs

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks: "why that long face?" The horse, being a horse, thus not being able to comprehend the complexities of a conversation, says nothing and then shits on the floor.

Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

3 ducks are sitting in a pond. one with blonde feathers. one with brown feathers, and one with white feathers. A Transvestite Inbred Donkey Man kills them instantly.

How do you start up a good conversation? Wanna have a good conversation?

Knock Knock. Who's There? Let Me In. Let Me In Who? Let Me In or I Will Kill You Tomorrow!

what is green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

Q: Why did the cat roll down the hill? A: It had no legs

What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

Why was the truck covered in blood? The chicken tried crossing the road

Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because people kept making the same joke about her not having arms so she was hoping the fall would break her neck.

Nice legs, what time do they open the free bar, I'd like to by you a drink.

How did the poor young women get Aids? She got raped.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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