A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the frog say Magican? Ribbet.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you wake up lady gaga? punch her in the dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Whats worse than receiving a dollar? Receiving a penny.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

N****R = nice israeli girl great education rich

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt. He actually got halfway across the road and was struck by a fast moving car. There is now a memorial on the side of the road mourning his death...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

It gets very hot in Mianus, Connecticut

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was the black man wet? He was sprayed by a hose.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you know if a monster is hiding under your bed or in your closet? Go and look.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What does the black guy say to his black friend? "I like Watermelon, Grape Drink, and Fried Chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a truck? You drive a truck, Michael Jackson has anal sex with little boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

If you have two berries in one hand, and three in the other, what do you get when you put them together? Five.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

why did the boy hug a very dislexic man it was his brother

thumb_up thumb_down -34

the your face joke

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Did you hear about that one time (@ band camp lol) where there was a little boy and he wanted to go swimming sooooo abd and then ooo look squirrel

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

So this guy and his monkey walk into a bar, I forget the rest of the joke but your mothers a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

What did the dog do when it raised its leg? It peed.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Im gonna Rape that Liberato kid you was talking about, ALL UP THE ASS i will find him.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

What do you call a Russian civil war? A war in which one side wants to seced from the other.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

"hey those pancakes look pretty good." "thats a cat steve."

thumb_up thumb_down +49

two philosophers stood in silence at the foot of a very large mountain; a mountain not only too high to climb, but also too wide to walk around. So the first philosopher finally speaks: "...so, what do you do for a living?"

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops