What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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Why did sally fall off her swingset? Because she was hit with a refrigerator.

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Q: Why did little Johnny not like little Suzie? A: He was a homosexual.

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

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what was the dying mans last words? im dying

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing, walls don't talk.

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What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from their camps

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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what's the difference between a bearded man and bearded lady the bearded man has a PENIS

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There was a deaf guy who heard a mute guy tell someone that a blind guy saw a guy with no legs win the marathon

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a big dick, Lets have sex.

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if it's friday, it must be China

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Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

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suck my a s s i hate mother f u c k e r s in my mother f u c k i n g crib

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How do you wake up lady gaga? punch her in the dick.

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What do you call a duck with a mustache? A duck with a mustache.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he felt the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies,"You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Three men died and were met at the pearly gates of heaven by St. Peter. Which not only proves that there is a heaven but that St. Peter actually does greet all of its new inhabitants at the entrance which is in fact marked by gates of pearl.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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So this guy tells me he hasn't had a bite in weeks. So i bought him lunch.

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What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

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I have read and agree to terms of service.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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