husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

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Rebecca Black sings a song.

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Why couldn't the black man get home? His car broke down, and Goodyear was closed.

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a duck walked into the 7-11, grabbed a slurpee and told the man at the register, "put it on my bill". But the man behind the counter was Indian, and could not understand what the duck was saying. The duck then walked out confused, wondering why he was buying a slurpee in the first place

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, your dad having sex with your girlfriend

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Q: why did the plain crash A: because the driver was a loaf of bread

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Knock knock Who's there? FBI

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How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

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. Deez nuts Ok

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

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Your mom is so fat she beat up snorlax from pokémon, than got charged for abbuse because it is illegal to use physical violence on pokémon unless in a battle or in attempt to capture one.

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What do you call an illegal citizen from the Middle East? Someone seeking a better life in a democratic country after suffering in a communist government for his entire life.

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Why didn't Dave buy his wife a watch for her birthday? Because she already had one.

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A father gives some golf balls to his son on his son's birthday. The son then goes into the woods with the golf balls, and then comes out without the golf balls. "What did you do with the golf balls?" asks the father. The son says nothing. On Christmas the father gives his son more golf balls, and the son does the same thing. He goes into the woods with them, and leaves without them. Again the father asks what he did with the golf balls, and the son says nothing. This happens for many holidays to come, until the son gets hit by a bus. In the ambulence, the father asks; "One last question ,what did you do with the golf balls?" The son dies

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A. Wanna Hear a funny joke? B. Yes! A. The WNBA.

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Your mother is so fat that unfortunately she can not fit into her picture for her passport and is not allowed to leave the country to go visit her dying mother.

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What do you call 3 horses in 1 boat, in the middle of the Dead Sea? Lost

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What do you call a man with no eyes or ears? - Deaf and Blind.

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wanna hear a really funny joke? sure women's rights.

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Two men are sitting in a bar. They finish their drinks and pay the bill before leaving.

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suck my a s s i hate mother f u c k e r s in my mother f u c k i n g crib

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How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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