One time i ate a sandwich it was good

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

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Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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An elephant walks into a bar. Except not really, it couldn't fit through the door.

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What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

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how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

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3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

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Hey, did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No He didn't either.

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How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

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Steering Wheel Face.

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Why is the world round? Because oranges are purple.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks: "why that long face?" The horse, being a horse, thus not being able to comprehend the complexities of a conversation, says nothing and then shits on the floor.

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What's green, fuzzy, and would likely cause fatal harm if it were to fall on someone? A pool table.

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Why did an abusive childhood affect the little boy's behavior? Beats me.

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whats the difference between santa claus and jewish people santa claus goes down the chimney and jewish people go up

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What did the man say to his wife before they went to bed? Goodnight.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Let Me In. Let Me In Who? Let Me In or I Will Kill You Tomorrow!

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why did the chicken cross the road? why do you care?

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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