How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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if u r not my friend, like this joke

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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What do you call 3 horses in 1 boat, in the middle of the Dead Sea? Lost

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i heart wiener

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what did the book say to the lamp? nothing because BOOKS CANT TALK

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What's the capital of Thailand? The letter 'T'...

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A man walks into a bar. Realizing that he left his keys in his car, he called a locksmith to unlock the doors. He did not have money to pay this locksmith and was put in prison for his large sums of debt. He was shanked by a fellow inmate and died a few days later in the prison's hospital ward.

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What did the frog say Magican? Ribbet.

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why did the boy hug a very dislexic man it was his brother

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Do you know what's funny? Retarded people.

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why were there moans coming from the sandusky household Mike sandusky, was having sex with his beutiful wife, maria meanwhile Mike's cousin, jerry was sitting in a jail cell

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What does spongebob do to get high. Nothing, spongebob doesnt exsist.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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What is the best thing about having sex with twenty-seven year old's? There's twenty of them

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Waseem likes to talk with his mouth full.

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Lets go Detroit Pistons!

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You're so straight!

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bartender says nothing. He was a mute.

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Your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it says 300 lbs.

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If you say gullible over and over again, it sounds like stupidity.

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"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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