What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? You shouldn't eat Jews, unless your a cannibal for which you should seek psychological help.

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Why is little Susie crying? Her entire family is dead.

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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Person 1: Do you like impressions? Person 2: Yes! P1: Why? ... P1: That was Socrates.

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#FEARtheFLAMINGOS

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Want to hear an anti-joke?

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steves legs

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A man walks into a bar. His alcoholism is destroying his family.

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What does a man like. food.

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What color is my lamp? Brown

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What happened to the man who was hit by a car? He was immediately rushed to a hospital and was reported to have a broken femur dislocated shoulder and several broken ribs. The driver was later found and was declared driving under the influence of alcoholic beverages and the victim's family sued the driver for the medical costs. The driver was arrested and was sent to a detention center for 3 months and the victim made a complete recovery.

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Why didn't Dave buy his wife a watch for her birthday? Because she already had one.

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What's orange and can fly through walls? A Magic Orange.

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What do you call an illegal citizen from the Middle East? Someone seeking a better life in a democratic country after suffering in a communist government for his entire life.

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Knock knock? Whose there? Who's. Who's who? No you used the wrong form of who's.

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A. Wanna Hear a funny joke? B. Yes! A. The WNBA.

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Your mama's so fat, she's dead!

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

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A mushroom walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We don't serve your kind." the mushroom asked why, the Bartender said, "Because your under aged"

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Q: Why did little Johnny not like little Suzie? A: He was a homosexual.

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whats bigger than a 4 school bus pile up? genocide.

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your face.

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Whats worse than having no mother? Having no mother and father, enabling you to have to support a family at the age of 12, using the allowance that your parents are supposed to give you once a week.

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Q: How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She shot herself in the head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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