why did helen keller fall down the stairs A; i pushed her

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because people kept making the same joke about her not having arms so she was hoping the fall would break her neck.

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3 ducks are sitting in a pond. one with blonde feathers. one with brown feathers, and one with white feathers. A Transvestite Inbred Donkey Man kills them instantly.

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Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

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I'm ginger no more needs to be said...

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A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

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How did the fireman get the cat out of the tree? He shot it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it

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Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner there is no god and everybody hates you.

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Guess what? Chicken butt

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A blind woman walks into a bar... she stands there confused because she is blind and can't tell what going on.

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What comes after "Q" R

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What do you get when you cross a horse and a pony? A mule

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what is the difference between a black person and a picnic bench? A picnic bench can support a family.

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Q:Whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead baby? A:The dog has skidmarks in front of it -RDV

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Obamacare!

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why did the kangaroo jump? because its a kangaroo

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How did the poor young women get Aids? She got raped.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown everything is brown Who shat in my garden?

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Today I had sex with a married man, but thats OK he's my husband

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What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

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What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

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hahaha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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