If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

what is green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

what is red and looks like blue paint? red paint.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

Knock Knock. Go away!

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

IF circles are squares and squares are purple and i dont know what im talking about does that make all potatoes orange?

Why did the kids stop playing tag? Because the boy was "it" was kidnapped and never seen again

Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

What do you call a black kid on a bike ? Dirt bike

why do black people like basketball? because it envolves running shooting and stealing

why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

what do you call a black guy in a house? a burglar

How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You could stab him repeatedly with a box cutter and demand his social security number, but I wouldn't suggest it. He would most likely beat you up.

A Starfish walks into a bar. He sits down next to a man with a concussion. Q: What did the man say? A: Nothing because he was in a concussion and was no longer able to say words.

Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

How do you know when a Mexican has died? Well based on the large mass of people inside and outside the funeral home who mostly seem to be of a mexican background and cultue, it would be safe to say that those are his/her friends and family who care deeply about them and therefore you could conclude that a Mexican person probably passed away. It's actually quite sad and going to be a rough few days for those closely connected to the person who died.

How do you have safe sex? Cut your own balls off

Why did the Black Man only eat one apple a day? He was trying to stay healthy. On an unrelated note he was under the poverty line, and addicted to an illegal substance. He does not represent African-American society very well.

What do you call a bunch of balck men running down a hill. A bunch of balck men running down a hill.

How do you know if you've been drinking too much? You find yourself in a closet screaming, "I'm in Narnia!!!"

What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree and lands on you, you'd die? A pool table.

Knock knock! Who's there? It's me, Allison. Oh, come in!

A black man walks into a Subway restaurant, and goes up to the counter. The cashier already knows that he's going to order the chicken, but how does he know? Because the black man is a regular, and orders the same thing every time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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