How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

What do you not want to get when playing scrabble? Diarrhea

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

The biggest lie on earth: I have read and agree to the terms of use.

How do you keep black people out of your back yard? Just like you would anyone else: buy a dog.

What do you call a man who gets off the train at Willoughby? Dead

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

Your mama's so fat, she's dead!

Q: where did the pickle live? A: In the desert

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No...........

Q.)What did the man say to the toilet A.) Hi Jon

A man runs into a bar and warns everyone about the hurricane.

What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

Lol you are really adorable, is more like maybe we will ask you some time, but hey, if you are asking, I mean you are beautiful, insecure, easy to break... I am totally joking by the way, you are completely down to earth, you are sweet, you know what you want, etc etc, hey, and to know what you want in life you got to be confident. Wait a second... I "act" like a savage? Lawl, "streams of OceANUS catchphrase"

Hitler

if it's friday, it must be China

abortion, it really brings out the kid in you.

wait am i supposed to right the joke down here

What did the frog say Magican? Ribbet.

You mamma's so fat that even Dora can't explore her!

The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

Do you know what paper I get?.... Loose leaf :o

I JUST HAD SEEX! How blantant, eh?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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