Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

Knock Knock Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben Dover.

I am black.

What's the difference between a black man and water? All black men have water in them, but not all water has a black man in it.

So I walked upstairs and I told the guy, "No." And he then asks, "Why?"

What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

How do you make a bowl of cheese? First you get a bowl. Then insert the cheese.

A very depressed man walks into a bar, sits down, and gives the bartender his credit card and says, "Keep giving me beers until I pass out." The bartender asks, "What's wrong Buddy? You can talk to me!" The depressed man explains that he was fired, his wife has been cheating on him for the past 2 years, both his daughters ran away and became prostitutes, his mother died after choking on his father's Genitals and the father had just been diagnosed with both brain and testicular cancer and will die within the week, his sister was kidnapped and sold into a sex slave market and has been missing for the past year, his brother confessed to being gay and committed suicide with his lover (male) after learning that their state did not accept gay marriage. He pauses to drink his beer, then continues on to say that he has been convicted of sexually assaulting a child even though he was innocent, his dog had just been run over by a tractor trailer with no physical body left to bury, his cat had gotten stuck in the garbage disposal and he turned it on without knowledge that the cat was sleeping inside. The man looks at the bartender and started to laugh and cry at his misfortune, he then said,"... And to top it all off i just spent the past 2 hours explaining this to a deaf bartender!" The man then went home and hung himself on the telephone pole outside his house. At the funeral only the bartender,who attended, spoke on his behalf, reciting the man's terrible life, then ending by saying, "This man death has motivated me to search for a cure to this rare Delusional Disorder."

SPAMS!!!

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

What did the pedephile do to the young boy? Smiled at him, said hello, and kept on walking.

Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Neither do they

Real jokes.

Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

Whats long and hard? a pole

Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Hey, did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No He didn't either.

Why did the black guy hate the white guy??? Because the white guy enslaved his ancestors.

I won the game.

For as long as i can remember, i've had memories

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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