knock knock come in

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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Why did sally fall off her swingset? Because she was hit with a refrigerator.

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Knock knock? Whose there? Who's. Who's who? No you used the wrong form of who's.

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

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what was the dying mans last words? im dying

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing, walls don't talk.

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What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from their camps

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There was a deaf guy who heard a mute guy tell someone that a blind guy saw a guy with no legs win the marathon

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a big dick, Lets have sex.

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Dear John,

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

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suck my a s s i hate mother f u c k e r s in my mother f u c k i n g crib

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if it's friday, it must be China

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What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A salad, hes on a diet

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What do you call a duck with a mustache? A duck with a mustache.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he felt the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies,"You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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So this guy tells me he hasn't had a bite in weeks. So i bought him lunch.

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

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What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

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-What's brown and rhymes with snoop? -Dr. Dre

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I have read and agree to terms of service.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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