Why couldn't the black man get home? His car broke down, and Goodyear was closed.

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husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

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Why couldn't santa eat cookies and milk at little Jimmy's house? He has diabetes and is unable to stray from a strict diet prescribed by his local doctor.

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What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? You shouldn't eat Jews, unless your a cannibal for which you should seek psychological help.

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why did the baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

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If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? It is an assessment intended to measure the respondents' knowledge or other abilities.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What does a man like. food.

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Want to hear an anti-joke?

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Knock knock? Whose there? Who's. Who's who? No you used the wrong form of who's.

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Why did the black guy walk into the supermarket and buy 100 bananas? Because he works at the zoo you racist!

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A. Wanna Hear a funny joke? B. Yes! A. The WNBA.

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What's similar about a black person and an apple? Nothing, an apple is a fruit. It has nothing to do with hanging from trees.

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What do you call 2 black men sitting on a porch? Craig and Smokey

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what's the difference between a bearded man and bearded lady the bearded man has a PENIS

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a big dick, Lets have sex.

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What's the differance between a pile of leaves and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a pile of leaves burning in my backyard.

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Hey your name is really Tifa? Sorry, I hate scheming, but in this kind of situation I have to play things safe, I have a wife to take care off, I mean it, I really hate it. Anyway, I got your number, location everything, now if you did send people to harm or even worse kill me, you wont be doing that again, trust me, if I die of an assault, you die next, whoever you are.

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if it's friday, it must be China

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what did the nazi say to the jew? hi

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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"I lost the game." Hahahahahahahahahahahaha in your face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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