What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

A black man, a Mexican, and a Jew walk into a bar. The white bartender kills them all because he was a huge racist.

Knock Knock Who's There? ... knock a door run

A cat and a dog walk into a bar. The bartender says "it's refreshing to see perennial enemies enjoying each others company".

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he was dead.

Dead babies.

Nice legs, what time do they open the free bar, I'd like to by you a drink.

What did the teacher say to the student who stepped on a rusty nail? You have to go to the Nurse's Office to get a band-aid- I don't have any.

what is green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

What's black and white and red all over? Lots of things, including certain ugly clothing.

When does the Trogdor come? In the Niiiiighhhttttt.

IF circles are squares and squares are purple and i dont know what im talking about does that make all potatoes orange?

What's worse than the titanic sinking 9-11

How do you know if you've been drinking too much? You find yourself in a closet screaming, "I'm in Narnia!!!"

What did the man say when he dropped an apple on his foot? That might have caused some minor discomfort had I not been wearing shoes.

A blind woman walks into a bar... she stands there confused because she is blind and can't tell what going on.

Q: Whats better than ten babies in ten trash cans? A: One baby in ten trash cans

Why do people often give Jimmy strange looks? Because Jimmy has Down Syndrome

What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

Once upon a time, You have a nice rack...

Your mother smells so bad that people make comments about it behind her back, and one person mailed her some soap.

What did the mole say? Nothing

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "My son was just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer."

How do you have safe sex? Cut your own balls off

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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