What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

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How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

Roses are red, Violet are blue. I just thought I'd let you know, But don't worry- this isn't a poem.

What do you call a cool pig? SPIDER-PIG!!!

How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

9/11

What did Pikachu say to Ghandi? Pika Pika

RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES

A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

a banana

What do a comb and a guitar have in common? Neither of them can climb trees.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

What did the sexually promiscuous man get for Christmas? AIDS.

Lockerbie bombing

A baby seal walks into a club

A black man walks into a bar. the bartender ask what he wants to drink. the black man responds , "i will have one beer please". so the bartender gives it to him and says have a nice day.

Why did the man loose his balls? he had testicular cancer and had to get them removed.

Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he wa depresed

What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

Why are Jews so tight with there money? They want to be finanically stable and provide a future for their familys.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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