Roses are read Violets are not green Chicken is good KFC baby, time to get lean

Black people are innocent.

What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

what do you call someone that is dying of malaria? someone that should consider visiting a doctor.

What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

Why did Hitler cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways. Only after practicing proper safety procedure did he venture across the busy thoroughfare to retrieve his asthma medication from his car.

Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

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What do you call a fat legless over weight black man called Tom. Tom.

Why did the man break into the bank? Because he was a bank robber

How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

What does AIDS stand for? Acquired immune deficiency syndrome

What do a large mouth bass and my wife have in common? They are both in the Animal kingdom, both are vertebrates and they share many other traits such as eyes, a notochord, and epaxial/hypaxial musculature.

Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You don't, Pikachu is a fictional character therefore doesn't exist

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come in!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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