what's the difference between babies and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

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If TACOS are Mexican PASTA is Italian HAMBURGER is American Then what is pizza???..... Dough, Cheese and Sauce Just Kidding, that was bad..... Turtles..... :D

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What did one Rhino say to the other? My, I'm sure glad we found this decadent watering-hole.

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how do you get a blue waffle? paint your vagina blue

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If you were an octopus what would you? Say "I an octopus".

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What's big, black, wide, long, and has white lines all over it? A new highway road.

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Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

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ghjwASFDJHKJZFKLJFHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHA GGGG DG FUC K DISLIKE ME!

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What's sweaty, fat, and Italian? Italians

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Love is in the air? Wrong. Nitrogen, Oxygen and Carbon Dioxide are in the air.

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knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

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What happened when the terrorist with a bomb went into a school. He blew up and everyone died.

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What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

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A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

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Rob Bell

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How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Commie. Commie who? Commie Johnson. We went to high school together.

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Chocolate tastes good.

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What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Joseph Kony. Give me your children.

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Roses are read Violets are not green Chicken is good KFC baby, time to get lean

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A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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