Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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What did the guy say to the mushroom?

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What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

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What's the opposite of fly? To not fly

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No.

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If John has 50 candy bars, and he eats 45, how many cadybars does John have? Diabetes, John has diabetes.

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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Knock knock Who's there? Me. Idiot.

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A businessman walks out of a store with his new haircut he was bald.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms.

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Small breasts.

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What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

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>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

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minorities

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Why couldn't the cat drink its milk? Because its ears were nailed to the floor.

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Today I had sex with a married man, but thats OK he's my husband

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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A black man walks into a Subway restaurant, and goes up to the counter. The cashier already knows that he's going to order the chicken, but how does he know? Because the black man is a regular, and orders the same thing every time.

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what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, he didn't my car got to him first.

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Nickelback

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting attacked by an evil demonic llama.

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A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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