How do you drown a blonde? From her infancy, instill in her a dread of the water. Keep her away from baths and showers, protect her from pools, and as the child grows, regale her nightly with terrible stories about the cruelty of the sea. When she has matured past 18, take her out to the middle of a lake on a boat and push her in.

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Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

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A pornstar walks into a church, she has remained close to Christ despite her condescending career choice.

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Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

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Your mom is so fat that it's becoming a serious health concern...

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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You're so straight!

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A man walked into the white house and security escorted him out because he didn't have a pass.

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You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Banana

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, and have a stimulating discussion about economics

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Chuck Norris is a normal man.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

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Roses are read Violets are not green Chicken is good KFC baby, time to get lean

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STOP LOOKING AT MY JOKE

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What type of movies do pirates watch? None they are on a boat!

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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What is black, white, and red all over? Obviusly a sunburned panguin.

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What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

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if life gives u lemons....chuck them back and say u wanted muffins instead!!!!!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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