Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

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Roses are red. So is bacon, Poetry is hard . bacon.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

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What happened when the terrorist with a bomb went into a school. He blew up and everyone died.

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What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

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What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? a pizza doesn't yell when it goes into an oven

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knock, knock no one answers man goes home and shots himself because he feels alone

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why did the mexican slave have cuts and bruises all over her. She fell off her skateboard... Another joke by rangler. thumbs up for more.

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One man said to another 'I think I'm going to have a chinese tonight.' the other replied 'it is wrong to eat people, even if they are chinese.'

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra but like he actually did not a bar a womens breats.

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What's big, black and long? The line in KFC

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How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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if you are what you eat then arent pornstars considered vaginas?

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How do you check that you are not dreaming, but in actual fact, you are wide awake? Try to bite off our finger (this is actually possible, but the brain does not allow you to do it).

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What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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-Why did Sara fall off the swing? -I don't know, why? -She had no arms, knock knock -Who's there? -Not Sara.

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What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

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A purple kangaroo hops into a bar. There is no such thing as a purple kangaroo. The end.

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What do gay horses eat?........ Cheese

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A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

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What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

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what's hard and pink going in a soft and wet coming out Gum

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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