Whats the definition of helpless? A quadraplegic in a washing machine

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what do you call a cucumber that is wearing a dress.... an asian lady

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why couldn't the cat drink its milk? Because its ears were nailed to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red Oh my gosh, my yard is on fire!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus doesn't exist. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid, you're standing right next to me!"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

So there's this cup that I own... I use it to aid in the drinking of my hot or cold beverages.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the teacher say to the student? You did very poorly on your homework and will never succeed. The student was black.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

cheese

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What was the hardest part about the orphanage burning down? My cock.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the boy kill himself? Because he wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did the noob say to the gamer your a gamer nooob

thumb_up thumb_down +8

steves legs

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how to you kill an Irish midget? You don't as murder is illegal and discriminating against a certain type of person is racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo Mama is so ugly she wears a mask on halloween

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a black person who flys a plane? Well, first ask for their name, then address them as such.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

thumb_up thumb_down +4

pubic lice.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Little Jimmy never make it in the NBA? Because he died at age 6.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why does LeBron James keep his phone on vibrate? Because he is often in the company of others and he does not want a ringtone to distract others from the current topic of discussion.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

gesss what happen u promis not to tell anyone ok this is what happen !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOTHING

thumb_up thumb_down +2

#FEARtheFLAMINGOS

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops