if u r not my friend, like this joke

Three men walked into a metal pole

Why did the man masturbate? Because there was no one who wanted to partake in sexual intercourse with him.

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, dogs can't speak English.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

Santa Clogged my toliet

Q.)What did the man say to the toilet A.) Hi Jon

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

Whats worse than bad sex. Being nice raped in the anus by a teletubby.

why are their no mexicans in hell they all jumped the border

A Jew returns change.

The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

Roses are red Violets are blue I need some money.

marble

Why was the little Latino boy sad? Because his father sexually molested him earlier in the evening.

Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map. Maria: This is it. Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America? Class: Maria did.

What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

Roses are red. So is bacon, Poetry is hard . bacon.

What happened when the terrorist with a bomb went into a school. He blew up and everyone died.

your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

Why did the women cover up her vaginal area? She was with her friends, queefed, and was extremely self conscious.

Why did the girl not apply for her American CItizenship? She was already an American Citizen.

A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...