Two men are sitting in a bar. They finish their drinks and pay the bill before leaving.

Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Paris. Paris who? Paris, France.

Roses are red. So is bacon, Poetry is hard . bacon.

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Just one.

Roses are white Violets are white I did it in the garden

Why did the black guy get arrested? Homicide.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

'Hey do you know a joke?' 'No' 'Me too'

What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

A pregnant woman takes the bus, once inside she realizes that there are no seats. No one was pollite enough to let her sit down so she felt pretty uncomfortable on the way home.

Whats 10+10? A mathematical equation.

Hey! did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she...

They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

Whats the difference between christians and nazis? one suppressed human rights and caused millions of deaths. the others were responsible for the holocaust.

What's the best part about Africa? Nothing.

A black guy and a Mexican jump off a bridge. Who dies first? Nobody cares.

That's what he said.

I man walks into a bar. He got drunk.

A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She was shot Knock knock Who's there? Sally Aren't you dead? Oh yeah K Well imma go be dead now Have fun K

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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