Hi poop!

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9/11 was a shocking time for all of us.

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A homeless man stumbles upon $100 bill. It is actually just a food wrapper, his eyesight is lackluster.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

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What's sweaty, fat, and Italian? Italians

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Hitler

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Why did Sally Fall Off The Swing? She had no arms Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally

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What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a porsche in my garage.

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a guy is driving home his wife calls him and she say's be careful there is a lunatic driving on the wrong side of the road towards traffic he then reply saying they all are

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Whats worse than being a Jew? Being black.

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Whats black and white and red all over? An interracial aborted fetus

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knock, knock no one answers man goes home and shots himself because he feels alone

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Why did the girl not apply for her American CItizenship? She was already an American Citizen.

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A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

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Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

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the awkward moment when Rick Astley gives you up

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Q. why didnt the boy get a christmas present from his dear grandmother? A. because she died on thanksgiving

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"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

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A man walked into the white house and security escorted him out because he didn't have a pass.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Commie. Commie who? Commie Johnson. We went to high school together.

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Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

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Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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