What do you call a cow with big horns? A bull.

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whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

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Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

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What is black, white, and red all over? Obviusly a sunburned panguin.

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What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

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Chocolate Bananas with Brocclie.wom

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A Black man walks out of a KFC.

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

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nbjhfghl

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Why Because

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You don't, Pikachu is a fictional character therefore doesn't exist

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What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

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what is worse than finding a fly in your coffee been raped

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A man walks into a bar. Ow!

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? seeing this joke 1000 times on this website

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Whats the definition of helpless? A quadraplegic in a washing machine

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What's worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

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Your momma's so fat: She has found a value in relationships beyond an aesthetic level.

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Why did the cat cross the road? He thought he would make it to the other side, but instead was hit by a mini van and soon after died in the bushes from internal bleeding.

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A homeless person dies.

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What do you call a one-armed man Whatever his name is

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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