FIONN'S HAIR 1 LIKE = £1 FOR A HAIRCUT

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This one time at band camp....I put a flute in it's proper storage compartment.

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did you ever see a butter fly?

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Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

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An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. It happens frequently at UK airports.

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what did the man with no legs get for Christmas? A piano

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A fat man buys a salad

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How do you have safe sex? Cut your own balls off

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Q: What happened when Timmy divided by zero? A: He got a syntax error.

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i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

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A Christian and a Jew walk into a bar. The bartender says "What'll you two have to drink?" The Christian says "I'll have a beer." and get this, the Jew says................................"I'll have a beer too."

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i feel bad for black people (even though u can't consider them people)

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"What was the hardest thing about that kid getting killed by that bus." "What?" "My dick"

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What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

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Billy was walking along the sidewalk. He strayed into someone's yard. He got run over by a lawnmower because he couldn't see with the frog he had stapled to his face.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street and one was asalted

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Knock knock Who's there? The police your son died in a car wreck.

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69

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Knock, knock. Who's there? A black Russian.

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professor x walks over to wolverine with good news, he falls and dies of a severe concussion

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why did Suzy drop her ice cream? doesn't matter, why is she out of the kitchen.

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Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

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A horse walks in a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse didn't reply because he was a hoarse horse.

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What did michael J. Fox say when someone asked him to play catch? "sorry, I'm busy".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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