What do you call a group of asians? China.

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cheese

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One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

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Q: Why is winter the best season? A: It eliminates the homeless.

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I had a dream I watched Inception.

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when does the phrase "time heals all wounds" not apply? to people with fatal wounds.

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What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

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The number one killer of daredevil's is the ground.

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what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped and left to die in the snow.

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What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

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What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

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Jack Oliver has a Bowl.

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Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

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What happens if you're in the middle of counting towels? You finish counting your towels.

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An rich man walks into a ghetto and buys something for 1 million dollars. what store was he in? he wasn't in a store,he got robbed

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

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Why was the farmer buried in a grave on the top of a hill? He had died and this would be his final resting place.

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why did Suzy drop her ice cream? doesn't matter, why is she out of the kitchen.

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Benevolent villain.

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Person 1: Do you like impressions? Person 2: Yes! P1: Why? ... P1: That was Socrates.

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When is a door not a door? When it was never actually a door in the first place and you just thought, for whatever reason, that i was.

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Santa Clogged my toliet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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