Your mom is so fat that it's becoming a serious health concern...

throbbing slobber

You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

How do you estimate the number of jippos in an area? Take the dole's numbers from that area and measure how far away they are from the nearest council landfill site.

Chocolate tastes good.

What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

Chuck Norris is a normal man.

no

Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

Why did the burglar rob the bank? because he needed money due to the economic decline.

What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

What type of movies do pirates watch? None they are on a boat!

A man walks into a store, and says to the cashier: "I'd like to buy 6 fridges". The cashier says: "Why do you need that many fridges?" The man says: "I'm an antelope!"

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

What do gay horses eat?........ Cheese

What do you call a black person in 1780? A slave mostly...

knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

what is white and sticky? glue.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...