roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why do Africans live in slums Because they have aids

thumb_up thumb_down +13

SAY

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many fingers am I holding up? None, my fingers were blown off by a hand grenade.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree and lands on you, you'd die? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

the WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

whats pink and fluffy? candy floss.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock knock. Use the doorbell, dumbass.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How much does a Mexican Parade cost? A Nickel

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between a black man and a monkey? Millions of years of evolution

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: I don't know, he didn't tell me.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why were corners made? For crying.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Please don't rape me.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A rebellious teenage boy throws a dozen eggs on the street, now he has no eggs.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

thumb_up thumb_down +3

steves legs

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did little Robbie get for Christmas? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +3

i said "what what in the butt, i said what what in the butt?"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops