A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

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A englishmen an irishmen and a ginger walk off a bridge gingers have no souls

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how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

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How do you estimate the number of jippos in an area? Take the dole's numbers from that area and measure how far away they are from the nearest council landfill site.

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You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Chocolate tastes good.

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What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

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why did the mother beat the young boy? Because he was adopted

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What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, and have a stimulating discussion about economics

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What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

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What type of movies do pirates watch? None they are on a boat!

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Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

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What do gay horses eat?........ Cheese

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

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What's worse than being named Troy Merrill? Being Black.

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knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

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What do you call a black person in 1780? A slave mostly...

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Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

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Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

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What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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