A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

How did Peter Parker tell his uncle that he was Spiderman? He didn't because he was already dead.

So Mel Gibson walks into a bar, and then everyone left.

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AROUND

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

What do you get when you make a website to put jokes on? People repeating the same joke over and over again, and still managing to get good ratings.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

Why is 6 afraid of 7... Because 7 raped her little sister

What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

Why did the old man fart?? Because he had gas

i have 2 penises

What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Ferrari ? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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