Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

Q. Why does Hugo masturbate? A. To build muscle.

A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

Three black men walk into a store at 2:00 in the morning, what happens next? They buy some snacks and leave.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

No.

What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

why did helen keller fall down the stairs A; i pushed her

What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

Yo mama so fat even Dora couldn't explore her!

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Hypothetical questions are a waste of time and you are not achieving your full potential by reading this during work.

Roses are flowers jordan does it for hours xxxxif ya know what i mean

What's worse than losing your job? Getting brutally sodimized and murdered by a serial rapist.

Steering Wheel Face.

What do you call a black Jew that is also a crippled midget with no family except for an autistic brother? His original name that his mother gave him at birth.

What do you call a black man in a police car? Officer.

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender brings him the beer, and the man drinks it. Then the man dies in a car crash while driving back to his family

This is not Will Smith.

Why did the sprinter lose the race He had no legs

Why did the old man fart?? Because he had gas

Q. What's brown and people don't care when they step on it? A. Dirt

What's bigger than a whale and has no water? Africa.

I don't hate you because you're fat. You're fat because I hate you

Once upon a time, there was boy. I saw this boy. So I sat on him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...