Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

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You are the third derivative of the position function.

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How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

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fart

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What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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Chocolate Bananas with Brocclie.wom

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

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Anti jokes are funny

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A Mexican and a black person both jump off a bridge, who hits the water first? Neither, as all matter falls at the same rate, regardless of weight, size, or ethnicity.

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What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

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Why do redheads have red hair Because they were born like that.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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Knock Knock COME IN!!!!

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No.

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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Slavery

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What did I say when I fell of THEEeEeeeeeeee...

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Why do Jewish people where hats in church? They feel there head will often get cold

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You don't, Pikachu is a fictional character therefore doesn't exist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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