Two people walk into a bar, the third one ducked.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

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How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

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Did you hear about the woman you got hit by a car? The Driver was intoxicated and had no control over his faculties which cause him to careen off of the road and hit this poor soul as she patiently waited at a crosswalk.

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Roses are flowers jordan does it for hours xxxxif ya know what i mean

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What did the man say to hitler? hi hitler.

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Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

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A chicken walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll it be?" His friends are very concerned about his sanity.

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What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

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A black man walks into a Subway restaurant, and goes up to the counter. The cashier already knows that he's going to order the chicken, but how does he know? Because the black man is a regular, and orders the same thing every time.

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My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

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This guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her head out and said, yes.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

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What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

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Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

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What do you call a mexican sleeping in a car tired.

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What did the teacher say to the student? You did very poorly on your homework and will never succeed. The student was black.

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Hello

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An Irishman stays home

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Wife: My husband is dead! Son: Sounds like a personal problem.

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Your mother gets so hungry, she eats.

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How do you drown a blonde? Hold her head under water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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