I asked the librarian for a book on suicide. She said "I'm sorry we don't have those in stock." So I just hung myself.

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There's a American, Mexican, and a Canadian stranded in the desert. They couldn't find any food, water, and shelter. They were all really hungry and thirsty. Later that day the Mexican dies from a very bad infection on his neck.

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what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

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Women's rights

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What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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An iguana walks out of a bar

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Why was the black man happy? He got a raise.

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Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner there is no god and everybody hates you.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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what do you call a black priest? holy shit!

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What do you call a black guy with a shotgun? A fine American citizen exercising his 2nd Amendment right.

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A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

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why was the snowman so happy? because a child placed pieces of coal in a "u" shape on it.

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how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

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Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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How can you tell Egyptian Bees are tired? When they put down their suitcases and yell "IM Tired!"

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What do you call a black man in a pumpkin patch? His name is Bill.

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why did the cow jump over the moon because it was on a high dose of lsd

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Why did the priest molest the small boy? Because he can.

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A woman walks into the bathroom and hears the sound of moaning. Not sure what to do she looks around and sees couples as far as the eye can see. She quickly turns to the woman and man standing next to her and asks what is going on here?! The woman says can't you read this is not a bathroom this is a public sex room! Only an idiot would ask that question. In shock the woman takes another look around and she spots someone she finds familiar. When she walks closer she finds that it is her boyfriend and that he is with another woman. Furious she walks up to him and slaps him in the face. The boyfriend looks at her and says sorry your sex just got old. Furious she says to him we never had sex!

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A black man walks into a Subway restaurant, and goes up to the counter. The cashier already knows that he's going to order the chicken, but how does he know? Because the black man is a regular, and orders the same thing every time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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