What was the hardest part about the orphanage burning down? My cock.

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Your Mamma is so poor that she begs for money.

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How can you tell if a duck is watching you? Look at its eyes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a predator and crossing the road led it away from it's pursuer.

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option 1, minecraft VS option 2, friends

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A little gir gets stung by a bee. Her parents see the bump She now geting meletedin Rehab because her parents saw her shoot up heroine.

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Why did a man get arrested in a bar He was covered in bombs and charged with terrorism

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Murray Harnett Smells like a dirty Burringbar Whore!

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Q: what do you call a guy with a stolen cat in his pocket A: The police because stealing animals is illegal

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Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

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Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

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Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

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What did the man with leprosy say to the prostitute? Keep the tip

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i saw a garbage truck it had garbage in it

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why did the boy poop his pants Yhe Holocaust

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Yo momma is so dumb she... oh god, i'm so sorry, she was driving and she just looked down at her cellphone and there was a red light and all the cars were coming she didn't even stop oh god i'm so sorry.

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Mexicans working in an office

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped after getting raped.

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Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms.

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A Ferrari Enzo and a Toyota Prius were having a street race. The Driver of the Ferrari died after he was hit by a bus.

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What's grosser than gross? Grosser. What's grosser than that? Grossest.

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Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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