Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

Why did Aodhan not come into school? He was sick.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

QUESTION: Why do black people do so poorly in school? ANSWER: Some statistics point to genetic disparities in intelligence between races, but others say it is due to more complicated social factors.

How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Brian. Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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