What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

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Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Brian. Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

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Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

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you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

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How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

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Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

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A man walks into a bar... and watches the Monday Night Football game with his pals.

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Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

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hrih

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what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

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What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

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Yo Mama is so stupid, she was riding her bike down the street when she was distracted and rode off a cliff. Oh crap I am so sorry.

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What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

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Christians

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

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Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

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3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

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Reduce, reuse, recycle Anti-joke.com

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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