a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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girl says..joe..................................................................... boy says...who is joe................. girl..the idiot of a helper at my skl

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Skittles are tasteless. Why? You can't taste the rainbow.

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Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Yo Mama is so stupid, she was riding her bike down the street when she was distracted and rode off a cliff. Oh crap I am so sorry.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I got a terminal disease and I'm going to die in six months. Mom if you're reading this I love you. Take good care of Joey.

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What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

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What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

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Whats worse than contracting H.I.V.? nothing

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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Welcome to Watchmojo dot com and today we'll be talking about the Top 10 numbers from 1 through 10. In this episode we will be discussing which numbers from 1 to 10 gain popularity and mainstream appeal amongst people from all over the world. Number 10. 10 (Ten) Number 9. 6 (Six) Number 8. 8 (Eight) Number 7. 4 (Four) Number 6. 5 (Five) Number 5. 3 (Three) Number 4. 2 (Two) Number 3. 9 (Nine) Number 2. 7 (Seven) Here are some honorable mentions: 3.14 9.9 1 and a half Number 1. 1 (One)

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What do you get when you a bunch of women and men with a high sex drive? A group of men and women with a high sex drive.

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What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

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What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

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I'm so popular... That I am friends with many people...

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What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

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a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

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What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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a horse walks in to a bar and the bar tender asks, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because it is a horse and is confused by its surroundings and then gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables as it makes its escape.

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Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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