Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

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The white guy did it!

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You.

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I have a knock knock joke. You start.

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women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

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what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

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Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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How do you kill Michael Jackson? You don't he is dead.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Why was little timmy's arm crooked His mom tried to pull his arm off.

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A fish walks into a bad Fish dont walk

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Why doesnt Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesnt float.

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Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

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Kony 2012

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Yo Mama is so stupid, she was riding her bike down the street when she was distracted and rode off a cliff. Oh crap I am so sorry.

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Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

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Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

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What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

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What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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