Your momma's so fat...

Why did the baby die? It got shot.

MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

girls basketball

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

What's the difference between a black man and cake? I like cake.

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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