roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

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How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

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what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

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A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

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knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

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A man walks around a bar.

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Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

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I went to the store and I fell

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Hi

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

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A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

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As a teen girl was walking through the perfume shop, she picked up one called, "Swirly Paradise." She sprayed it on her and sniffed the sweet scent. Suddenly, the world spun around and she suddenly woke up inside an empty bra. A mouse sniffed her and ate her alive.

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

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The Holocaust

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Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, ask him.

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what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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What's worse than being a black Jew? Being a racists anti-Semite.

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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