Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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lebron

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Chuck Norris can watch TV.

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How do you make a man sit down? Hold him at gunpoint.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

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Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

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Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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Christians

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Brian. Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops