How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

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Why was little timmy's arm crooked His mom tried to pull his arm off.

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What's that smell? Your feces droping in the toilet

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

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a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

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Women's Rights

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What's worse than being a black Jew? Being a racists anti-Semite.

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Why didn't the man enter the bus driven by a black man ? It wasn't going where the man had to go.

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knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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The white guy did it!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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