a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

*Random individual accidentally throws a ball toward another person's head while chilling out with friends* *The ball comes into contact with the victim's cranium- causing him much pain, but not serious detriment.* Q: Are you feeling okay? A: No, I'm dizzy and am currently in very bad shape Response after initial inquiry was articulated: "Uhmmmm...Sorry?" Lesson of significance to be learned from this tragic incident: One's developed, habitual reactions to certain occasions/events of particular interest are virtually always practically impossible to completely override with the means of logic when one is experiencing the relevant occurances him/herself personally. One usually finds it inordanitely difficult to free him/herself from one's regular routines.

What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

whats black. an african american person

What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

what was the dinosaur after it got out of the pool? wet

What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

How do you have sex with the blue waffle? stick your penis inside

Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Brian. Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

knock knock. who's there pismil pismil who pigsmil cookies

Hi

How did the cat die? I just it nine times

i think i have a problem with these jokes they aren't finny

you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...