so a baby seal walks into a club...

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Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

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whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

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What a vase and a cheeseburger have in common? It has it's price.

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Whats green and tasty? Snot

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What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

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A blind man walks into a bar Backs up, and walks around it.

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

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Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

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where did the black person go poop ? in the toilet!

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Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

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A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

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What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

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A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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Who's more mean than teacher Hitler

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a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Weird, orange is my favorite color.

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I went to the store and I fell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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