A BABY seal walks into a club

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

The white guy did it!

Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

knock knock. who's there pismil pismil who pigsmil cookies

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

Why did the black man shoot everyone? Because he is black

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

why was the dog barking?? bryan is a douche..... get it troupe.

A fat man on a moped

what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

Your momma's so fat...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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