Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

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So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

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knock knock. who's there pismil pismil who pigsmil cookies

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Want to hear a joke about Potassium? So do I.

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Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

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you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

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Why did the boy kill his father? Because he was molesting him.

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A man walks into a bar... and watches the Monday Night Football game with his pals.

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

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A fish walks into a bad Fish dont walk

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Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

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1134

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How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

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A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

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A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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How do you fit 100 ethiopians in a phone box? With great difficulty.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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