hrih

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A fish walks into a bad Fish dont walk

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Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What a vase and a cheeseburger have in common? It has it's price.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

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Why wasn't the 7 year old boy happy? I shot him

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

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If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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"The lack of a punch line is the punch line" Oh

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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