How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

thumb_up thumb_down

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down

A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

hrih

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

(in a retarted voice) i want to go to disneyland

thumb_up thumb_down -18

That joke was so funny that I fell off my dinosaur. Then afterwards had to be put in a rehabilitation center because I am schizophrenic and dinosaurs are extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Runescape.

thumb_up thumb_down -84

Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

thumb_up thumb_down -166

What rymes with milk..... milf

thumb_up thumb_down +89

How Long is a Chinese name.

thumb_up thumb_down +87

Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

thumb_up thumb_down +71

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops