What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

What would be funny? Seeing justin beiber 's penis.

What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

I can see you under there. Under what?

2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Actually it couldn't even walk because of all the hormones they injected into it in order to genetically enhance it's size and flavor.

"The lack of a punch line is the punch line" Oh

A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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