when god gives you lemons, you find a new god!

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What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

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Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

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I can see you under there. Under what?

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A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Actually it couldn't even walk because of all the hormones they injected into it in order to genetically enhance it's size and flavor.

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"The lack of a punch line is the punch line" Oh

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-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

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BUT HWY?

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Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

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knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

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Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

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why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

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Why do u call a book a book??? Cause it is a book!!!

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123457

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So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

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There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

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What's sad about four black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? Jerome never wanted it to end like this. James, his best friend, was drunk... Again. That was just the way he was. He got wasted, did something stupid, apologized, and then did it again. But this time, there would be no next time. They were supposed to be going to their graduation party, but instead, James fell asleep at the wheel. The cliff was rapidly approaching, and the doors were locked. All Jerome could do now was pray. Also, the Cadillac costed a lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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