a horse walks in to a bar and the bar tender asks, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because it is a horse and is confused by its surroundings and then gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables as it makes its escape.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q. The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? A. Yes, to be exact it is 8.30662386.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

thumb_up thumb_down -22

The big problem with politicians is they're always lying but fortunately there's always a moment when it's not a problem anymore. When they do it down in their tombs.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's that smell? Your feces droping in the toilet

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

thumb_up thumb_down -62

How's your mum? she's dead..

thumb_up thumb_down -118

Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

thumb_up thumb_down -172

What rymes with milk..... milf

thumb_up thumb_down +89

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I got a terminal disease and I'm going to die in six months. Mom if you're reading this I love you. Take good care of Joey.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Two elephants are in a bath tub. The first elephant says to the other elephant, "can you pass the soap?" The second elephant then replied, "No soap, radio."

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

I can see you under there. Under what?

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops