you.

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what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

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Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

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Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

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Two guys walk in to a bar the third one ducks.

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

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What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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A man walks into a bar... and watches the Monday Night Football game with his pals.

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Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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What happened to the Caucasian man who went to Vegas? He lost all his money so the government took away his car and his house so he had to become homeless and live on the streets begging for money from any who walked by until he slowly starved to death after eating food left in restaurants and trashcans.

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What did the black boy get for christmas? An Xbox.

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panda bears are racist to mexicans-they are black, white and asian

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What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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