why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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Roses are red, Muslims are brown, When I see them swimming, I hope that they drown!

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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How did Hitler make the world a better place? He died.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

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A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

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What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

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A man walks around a bar.

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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What do you call a man who has reached the highest level of prestige in all Call of Duty games? A Virgin

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Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i dont have any cones, just rods.

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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A black man bought a large condom because he has a big penis.

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hrih

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roses are red violets are blue i had sex with your dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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