What's worse than being a black Jew? Being a racists anti-Semite.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

whats black. an african american person

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

who did the strait guy marry? a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man decides to go hunting in the woods with a shotgun, he is going through the woods and a bear randomly pops out of no where, knocks him down and rapes him. So the next day he came back with an even bigger shotgun and said, "i am going to kill this bear" so he goes through the woods, the bear comes out of nowhere, knocks him down and rapes him again. So he comes back the next day with and even bigger shotgun and says, " i am going to kill this bear, skin it, and eat it" so hes going through the woods and out comes the bear, knocks him down, gets real close to his face and says, "you dont come out here for the hunting do ya".

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's round and red? A round and red solid.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -78

Gale swallows.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops