Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

Why did the black man shoot everyone? Because he is black

What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

what is darker than black?... YOU

girl says..joe..................................................................... boy says...who is joe................. girl..the idiot of a helper at my skl

Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I got a terminal disease and I'm going to die in six months. Mom if you're reading this I love you. Take good care of Joey.

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

Christians

I can see you under there. Under what?

-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

Are you from Tennessee? cuz i wanna makeout with your face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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