A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

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So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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How did the cat die? I just it nine times

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

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Have you seen stevie wonders house? Nope... Neither has he

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There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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A teenage boy walks into a bar, he doesn't even know he's slowly drinking his life away

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Cadillac? A Cadillac is a car, and a dead baby is a morose and disgusting topic of internet humor.

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2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

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Yee

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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A frog found a smoking cigarette on the road, so he/she takes it, smokes it, and explodes.

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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What is the worst part about being a black Jew? Having to sit at the back of the gas chamber.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops