I Hear Boston Is having a blast.

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

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What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

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Knock knock. Whose there. Uninterupting black lady. Uninter.... MMMMMMMHHHHMMMM. Black ladies never listen

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A blind man walks into the door of a bar

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Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

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A man walks into a bar and the the llama next store sprouted wings and flew Then a potato says hi to a iPod but unfortunatly the iPod can't talk. Meanwhile hello kitty and ducks wage a nuclear war and the rise of ostriches Started. The a giant cucumber started falling of mt. Everest and killed many Flying platipuses were saved. Then aliens started invading and the world ended.

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Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

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What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

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Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

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how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

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How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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