What a vase and a cheeseburger have in common? It has it's price.

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What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

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girl says..joe..................................................................... boy says...who is joe................. girl..the idiot of a helper at my skl

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What’s brown, sticky and smells like poo? Shit!!

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when god gives you lemons, you find a new god!

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

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A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

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What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

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What did the thief get for Christmas? Nothing. He was sentenced to the death penalty.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

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Why was the black guy good at basketball? He practiced hard everyday.

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what was the dinosaur after it got out of the pool? wet

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

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3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

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Welcome to Watchmojo dot com and today we'll be talking about the Top 10 numbers from 1 through 10. In this episode we will be discussing which numbers from 1 to 10 gain popularity and mainstream appeal amongst people from all over the world. Number 10. 10 (Ten) Number 9. 6 (Six) Number 8. 8 (Eight) Number 7. 4 (Four) Number 6. 5 (Five) Number 5. 3 (Three) Number 4. 2 (Two) Number 3. 9 (Nine) Number 2. 7 (Seven) Here are some honorable mentions: 3.14 9.9 1 and a half Number 1. 1 (One)

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

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what did the Spanish priest say to the Ukranian gynocologist? *fart*

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Why did the black man perform well? Because he was a well trained musician by the name of Stevie Wonder.

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why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

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what has legs but can't walk? a paraplegic

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What's the difference between a black man and cake? I like cake.

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whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops