How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

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A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

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What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

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Yee

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Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

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I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

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all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

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Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

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Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

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give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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I Hear Boston Is having a blast.

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What’s brown, sticky and smells like poo? Shit!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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