A man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he shouted after he stubbed his toe on a table.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

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Why did Aodhan not come into school? He was sick.

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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Whats worse than the Halocaust? Your mom

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Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

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-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

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What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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Welcome to Watchmojo dot com and today we'll be talking about the Top 10 numbers from 1 through 10. In this episode we will be discussing which numbers from 1 to 10 gain popularity and mainstream appeal amongst people from all over the world. Number 10. 10 (Ten) Number 9. 6 (Six) Number 8. 8 (Eight) Number 7. 4 (Four) Number 6. 5 (Five) Number 5. 3 (Three) Number 4. 2 (Two) Number 3. 9 (Nine) Number 2. 7 (Seven) Here are some honorable mentions: 3.14 9.9 1 and a half Number 1. 1 (One)

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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u smell oh no of wat?? dunno i just know its BADDDDDDD !!!!!! k.c

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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what did the Spanish priest say to the Ukranian gynocologist? *fart*

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What do you call a black man without a job? Unemployed.

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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How do you kill Michael Jackson? You don't he is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops