Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

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The big problem with politicians is they're always lying but fortunately there's always a moment when it's not a problem anymore. When they do it down in their tombs.

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Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

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Why was little timmy's arm crooked His mom tried to pull his arm off.

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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What would be funny? Seeing justin beiber 's penis.

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

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Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

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How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

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I can see you under there. Under what?

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"The lack of a punch line is the punch line" Oh

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what is not funny? This joke.

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

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How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

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What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

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A man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he shouted after he stubbed his toe on a table.

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What's yellow and dangerous? China.

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women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

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Q. The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? A. Yes, to be exact it is 8.30662386.

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What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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