Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

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Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? A. He got attacked by a dog.

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Two elephants are in a bath tub. The first elephant says to the other elephant, "can you pass the soap?" The second elephant then replied, "No soap, radio."

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What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

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u smell oh no of wat?? dunno i just know its BADDDDDDD !!!!!! k.c

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What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

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Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Brian. Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

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you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

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Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

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What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

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What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

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Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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hi

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

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What’s brown, sticky and smells like poo? Shit!!

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What happens when some one breaks apart your little brother's lego tower? You have a screaming little brother and a bunch of legos all over the floor.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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