What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

I can see you under there. Under what?

Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Actually it couldn't even walk because of all the hormones they injected into it in order to genetically enhance it's size and flavor.

"The lack of a punch line is the punch line" Oh

Yee

Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

I have a knock knock joke. You start.

how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Brian. Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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