A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was dead and therefore unable to escape the Chick fil A bag it was being carried in.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks around a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

thumb_up thumb_down +3

nick toth

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

How do you make a man sit down? Hold him at gunpoint.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

What do homosexual men do during sex? I don't know, but if you want to, I suggest you ask one of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops