Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

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Your momma's so fat...

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Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

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What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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Two cannibals are eating around a fire in the jungle, and one turns to the other and says "Does this taste funny to you?" Oh yeah, and they're eating a clown.

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

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The white guy did it!

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So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

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pedophile

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

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How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

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Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

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Why do people discriminate against black people? Because they show an undeserving amount of disrespect towards the rest of the world and why should they get anything better than what they offer.

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Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

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Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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