A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

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So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

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The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

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a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

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Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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A teenage boy walks into a bar, he doesn't even know he's slowly drinking his life away

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What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

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Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

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Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

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what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

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Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

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Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

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Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

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Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

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Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

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Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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