What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Hi

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Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

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i think i have a problem with these jokes they aren't finny

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what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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How do you kill Michael Jackson? You don't he is dead.

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What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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How do you make a man sit down? Hold him at gunpoint.

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knock knock whos there? your mother your mother who? ...........what?

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what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

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What's black, white,and red all over? A crime scene where a black and white man were brutally murdered by a psychopath that is still on the loose and could be killing someone else.

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roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

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Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

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I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

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QUESTION: Why do black people do so poorly in school? ANSWER: Some statistics point to genetic disparities in intelligence between races, but others say it is due to more complicated social factors.

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A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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