I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

What do you call a boy that fell off a ferry? Extremely unlucky, since one of the other passengers noticed and the captain turned the ferry around, threw him a ladder, and pulled him aboard. Also he died of hepatitis because his mother was too poor to afford condoms, so he was born with it.

what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

Why did the chicken cross the road? there were no more cars in the way

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

What do you call a black man and woman with a little white girl? A Family.

a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

Women's Rights

Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Cadillac? A Cadillac is a car, and a dead baby is a morose and disgusting topic of internet humor.

What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

whats black. an african american person

lebron

What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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