What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

Why did the boy kill his father? Because he was molesting him.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

Chuck Norris can watch TV.

what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

Runescape.

What's black, white,and red all over? A crime scene where a black and white man were brutally murdered by a psychopath that is still on the loose and could be killing someone else.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

How many jews can get in a Volvo? 5.

A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

Wumbo

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sexual offender.

Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

I went to the store and I fell

How did the cat die? I just it nine times

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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