Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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What do you call a black man and woman with a little white girl? A Family.

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a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

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A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

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Women's Rights

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Cadillac? A Cadillac is a car, and a dead baby is a morose and disgusting topic of internet humor.

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What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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whats black. an african american person

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YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

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why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

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if a black man, a Chinese man, and an Indian were about to jump off the Eiffel tower, who would hit the ground first? who cares?

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So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

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You.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? there were no more cars in the way

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a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

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How did the cat die? I just it nine times

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Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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