what do you call a homosexual kid? A Kerich

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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knock knock. who's there pismil pismil who pigsmil cookies

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So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

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The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

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Rich merchant started build a new bigger home for his family. He bought good blueprints and hired some construction workers to build it up. It took 2 years for the house to finish. Just few days before moving in, he had an horrible nightmare where little green men set the house on fire. When he woke up, he heard the bad news. House was burned down during the night. Merchant was shocked and sad. After couple of weeks, he decided to build a new house. This time a smaller one. Again he bought blueprints and hired people to work for him. Almost a year later, the house was starting to be finished. And again he saw that nightmare of little green men burning the house down. At morning he already knew the news and started to investigate these happenings. Local police officer couldn't help him and so didn't anyone else he asked. Merchant decided to try once more to build new home. This time he had money only for a small farmhouse. Building it up last 6 months, and almost every night merchant was guarding the construction site for little green men. Farmhouse finished in time and merchant moved in. In couple weeks he started to relax and think that little green men stopped harassing him. At one night, couple of months after moving in. Merchant saw the nightmare again, and woke up in burning house. He escaped from the window and saved his wife and children. Then he ran to the village to call for help. The next morning, merchant was sitting next to his burned home and just thinking the motives for green men, what did he do in past so that green men were angry at him? Some villagers had come to watch the burned house and merchant saw something green in middle of the crowd. He slowly walked towards the crowd and saw this little man fleeing. He started to pursue this man and was pumped with adrealine. Didn't last long when merchant catched this little guy and held him in the ground to ask "Who are you? Do you have anything to do with those housefires?" The little green man was calm and relaxed as he answered "No."

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What do you call a black man without a job? Unemployed.

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whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

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What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

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Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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Your mom is so...wonderful.

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A black man, a Jewish man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They are all good friends who want to enjoy drinks together.

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

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Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

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Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

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The white guy did it!

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What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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