Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

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What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

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The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

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Why did Uncle Monty shove his head up a horses arse? Because it gave Doris an erection. She chose to keep her male genital organs following her gender changing procedure, so that she could still father children.

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What's brown and sticky? a stick

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What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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What happened after a Mexican drank 4 shots? He got drunk and died in a car accident.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

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what little black and can make a woman scream a womans dead roting baby

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How do you keep a mexican from drowning? Take your foot off the back of his head.

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Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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a man is stranded on a deserted island with no food, water or clothing and he comes upon a magical genie lamp, a genie pops out and tells him that he has three wishes, the man asks for food,water, and clothing, the genie says "of course" the man was elated but then the genie says " but i'm afraid to tell you that genies don't exist and your hallucinating from your harsh living conditions...i'm sorry" the man lived two more weeks before dying slowly...

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Yo mama is so fat, so when she jumped of a building, she died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

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A baby seal walked into a club.

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Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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