When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Q. What do you call a bunch of guys in a shower? A. The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what would be worse then 9/11 and the holocaust? -if the twin towers fell on a concentration camp

thumb_up thumb_down -26

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

thumb_up thumb_down -80

A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

thumb_up thumb_down -118

A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -124

Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

America

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the squirrel say to the dog? "I have AIDS."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops