2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

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What's green and has wheels? Dave Matthew's Band

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What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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How many rednecks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three.

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A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

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how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

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What do you call thousands of people starving all across the globe? Not my problem.

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Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

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Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

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Men's Rights

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what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

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I have no soul so I must consume yours

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why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

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Roses are red My binoculars are blue The curtains are open I see you

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My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

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Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Muffin 1: Gosh it's hot in here. Muffin 2: Holy Crap! A talking muffin!

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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Why did Cody sit in the corner? Because his daddy didn't love him. #DaddyDoesn'tLoveYouAnymoreChair

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Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops