Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

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How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

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A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

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I hate being bi-polar; it's awesome!

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German strand on an island. Searching the jungle, they fall into a trap. They get painfully killed and eaten by the cannibals.

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When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have an optical disorder

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Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

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What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

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A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

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How did the black man get a new television? He worked hard and put away a small percentage of his weekly wage in order to save for this new addition to his household.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

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A man dressed in a white sheet shows up at an African American's door, they sit in the living room drinking coffee and watching the weather.

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Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops