America

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Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

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i like cats

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

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Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

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What's wrong the a man who can't tell where he is, can't tell where he's going, and doesn't know how to use a map? Downs Syndrome

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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A man called his dentist and asked when he should make an appointment. The dentist told him to come in around two thirty pm because that's when the next appointment was available.

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PATHETIC

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

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What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

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Justin Bieber

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Q. What do you call a bunch of guys in a shower? A. The Holocaust.

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When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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