I hate being bi-polar; it's awesome!

what little black and can make a woman scream a womans dead roting baby

You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

What's worse than being a Packer Fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... oh, wait....

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

I'm hungry.

Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

What's wrong the a man who can't tell where he is, can't tell where he's going, and doesn't know how to use a map? Downs Syndrome

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza One is an ethnicity derived from Africa and One is an Italian dish that is well'ly known in all four corners of the world.

How many Mexicans can you fit into a car? The bathroom is on the left, mam.

Q. What do you call a bunch of guys in a shower? A. The Holocaust.

Roses are green Violets are yellow I have an optical disorder

whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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