Anyone reading this I'm not writing anything Kevin

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Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

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America

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

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Hear the one about the giraffe and the clown? Yes.

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Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

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Sometimes, people ask me, "Do you always have to be so obnoxious?" And to that I reply, "I don't always, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis." Stay thirsty, my friends.

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So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

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A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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385

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A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

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My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

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The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

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A twelve year old walks into a bar. How Tragic

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Dont look at me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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