*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

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Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

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what little black and can make a woman scream a womans dead roting baby

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

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Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

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What do you call an Indian cook, that cooks in a Chinese restaurant? A chef

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A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue.

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A horse walks into a bar the barkeeper asks 'Why the long face?' The horse, incapable of speaking English, walked around in a circle, excreated and left.

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Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

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Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza One is an ethnicity derived from Africa and One is an Italian dish that is well'ly known in all four corners of the world.

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What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

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How many Mexicans can you fit into a car? The bathroom is on the left, mam.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

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Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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