In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy mad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy in pain? A: Because a clown was ripping off the boys big toes with a hacksaw, all the while causing the small boy emotional pains by killing the boy's orange cat.

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whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

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A man walks into a bar.... no wait! It's a horse! A man walks into a horse...

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What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

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Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

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a black man jumps in a pool.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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i like cats

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Doctor, people always laught at me at work! :( What do you do for a living? I am a comedian...

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, and it's destroying he's family

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why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

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How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

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I saw a man lying on the floor. He ate too much cake.

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A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

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A homeless man comes home from work.

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How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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Somewhere, sometime in the world a man leads his country prominently in an era of change. He makes beautiful and strong speeches to his people. He also kills millions of Jewish people. No seriously, he kills millions of people it's great.

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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