What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

What did I write on this website? This antijoke.

when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

Yes.

Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

What did Scooby Doo say to Shaggy? Raggy

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza One is an ethnicity derived from Africa and One is an Italian dish that is well'ly known in all four corners of the world.

Yo mama so fat she doesn't need news, shes worldwide. ~YN~

What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

What's worse than your mom finding out she has AIDS? After she found out she had AIDS she stormed out of the hospital and got run over by a bus.

Are You McDonalds Because I'm Loving It

A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

A man called his dentist and asked when he should make an appointment. The dentist told him to come in around two thirty pm because that's when the next appointment was available.

If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

Anyone reading this I'm not writing anything Kevin

a man is stranded on a deserted island with no food, water or clothing and he comes upon a magical genie lamp, a genie pops out and tells him that he has three wishes, the man asks for food,water, and clothing, the genie says "of course" the man was elated but then the genie says " but i'm afraid to tell you that genies don't exist and your hallucinating from your harsh living conditions...i'm sorry" the man lived two more weeks before dying slowly...

Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

Yo mamas so fat, that I need a new pair of sunglasses.

Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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