Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

thumb_up thumb_down +54

A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. They discuss their differences over a pint of beer and leave with a greater understanding of each other's faiths.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's broken to the side of the road and covered in cookie crumbs? A girlscout that got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

roses are red violets are blue i suck at poetry show me your tits

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

thumb_up thumb_down -174

Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -188

What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down +91

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops