Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

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Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

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A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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Simon says; "You're adopted."

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Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

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Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

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cats are afraid of dogs. mice are afraid of cats. elephants are afraid of mice. bf-2 fighter jets are afraid of elephants. is this true?

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

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roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

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You

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

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3 jews walk into a bar I lied it was a gas chamber

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Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops