How many hamburgers can a grizzly bear eat? Maybe 6.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I grew up, if we cannot live for ourselves, we cannot live for others, remember how people admired us when in their presence, while mocking us behind our backs, most humans do nor respect those that do not rule with lies, false promises, all backed up by an army no amount of civilians can defeat. We lost because people got what they wanted, preferring false promises from all ranging from their Gods, to their politicians speaking about their Gods, promises of betterment as a result of war in the name of Gods, but we are not that people. The problem is, that I used to believe that all of humanity possessed the potential people you and I have, and realize now that when I began looking down at people, I began looking down at myself, considering us all equal to them. Red, we might be few, but we are worth far more than those we consider our equals, maybe it is time even we, sought to rule those that desire to be ruled, rather than to help them find their desired path, because their desired path, might always have been to be ruled.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Yo mamas so fat, that I need a new pair of sunglasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Doctor, people always laught at me at work! :( What do you do for a living? I am a comedian...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

thumb_up thumb_down -39

-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

thumb_up thumb_down -75

Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -117

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy mad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy in pain? A: Because a clown was ripping off the boys big toes with a hacksaw, all the while causing the small boy emotional pains by killing the boy's orange cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

i like cats

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, and it's destroying he's family

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

thumb_up thumb_down +2

So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

thumb_up thumb_down

A horse walks into a bar the barkeeper asks 'Why the long face?' The horse, incapable of speaking English, walked around in a circle, excreated and left.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops