Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

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When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have an optical disorder

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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69

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Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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So i was thinking of going to japan for spring break. I've heard they have some awesome swells.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

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How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

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On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy mad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy in pain? A: Because a clown was ripping off the boys big toes with a hacksaw, all the while causing the small boy emotional pains by killing the boy's orange cat.

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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what sucks? things that suck

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why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

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What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

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How do you kill a crackhead Put her in a shredder and put the remainings in your ex wifes refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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