What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

roses are red violets are blue i suck at poetry show me your tits

thumb_up thumb_down +5

whats worse than 9/11 a paper cut

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are Red Violets are Blue And you will be too when i'm done with ya

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red Violets are blue Last night I came home to find my entire family murdered....

thumb_up thumb_down -31

When does the narwhal bacon? When the universe looses its realism to the point where every animals' meat is bacon at a certain time, and a person hunts a narwhal at the crack of dawn when there is a triple rainbow and the narwhal's DNA is combined with a pig's just long enough for the meat to be bacon when the person shoots it.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What kind of "room" can you not enter? One with a locked door.

thumb_up thumb_down -97

Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

thumb_up thumb_down -109

Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

thumb_up thumb_down -173

What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. They discuss their differences over a pint of beer and leave with a greater understanding of each other's faiths.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Roses are green Violets are yellow I have an optical disorder

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +30

how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

thumb_up thumb_down +28

9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what is brown and shaped like a tree?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops