A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

What's black and hangs from trees? tires ...and black people

What did Scooby Doo say to Shaggy? Raggy

I grew up, if we cannot live for ourselves, we cannot live for others, remember how people admired us when in their presence, while mocking us behind our backs, most humans do nor respect those that do not rule with lies, false promises, all backed up by an army no amount of civilians can defeat. We lost because people got what they wanted, preferring false promises from all ranging from their Gods, to their politicians speaking about their Gods, promises of betterment as a result of war in the name of Gods, but we are not that people. The problem is, that I used to believe that all of humanity possessed the potential people you and I have, and realize now that when I began looking down at people, I began looking down at myself, considering us all equal to them. Red, we might be few, but we are worth far more than those we consider our equals, maybe it is time even we, sought to rule those that desire to be ruled, rather than to help them find their desired path, because their desired path, might always have been to be ruled.

Hi

The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

5

Hear the one about the giraffe and the clown? Yes.

What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

what would be worse then 9/11 and the holocaust? -if the twin towers fell on a concentration camp

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Comfortably, four.

Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

After Fighting Apollo creed. Rocky screams ADRIAN!!!! After 3 days of cardiac arrest he realises that ardian is a fregment on his imagination

What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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