If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

So i was thinking of going to japan for spring break. I've heard they have some awesome swells.

What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy mad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy in pain? A: Because a clown was ripping off the boys big toes with a hacksaw, all the while causing the small boy emotional pains by killing the boy's orange cat.

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

what sucks? things that suck

why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

After Fighting Apollo creed. Rocky screams ADRIAN!!!! After 3 days of cardiac arrest he realises that ardian is a fregment on his imagination

Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

Why did the alien cross the road. To get to his ship.

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

Women's Rights.

What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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