What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

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Uh, "Abel", seriously get over here and then get some sleep, not only did you get the code all wrong, there is no number to be deciphered at all, besides its called a laptop with a battery. Speaking of general dumbass... You have not changed the least, you really remind me of a cruel, sloppy, less disciplined (except the wise cracking thing Nero resorted to to push me away and apparently dodge gun fire, maybe his way of handling nerves. You might look like him, but personality wise you are completely different, cruel, sloppy, graphical, I mean did you ever see Nero get angry? I never did. That said Neo-Nero, you are a nice guy too, especially if you get here fast enough, I mean this place is freezing.

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Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

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Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

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What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

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Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

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When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

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9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

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why did tom get HIV? He was raped by a giant scorpion

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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Yes.

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I'm hungry.

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What's 7+7? 14 you dumbass

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at poetry show me your tits

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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Chuck Norris is a regular human being, just like the rest of us.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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