A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

what do you call a cow? A cow

The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

What do you say when a black girl asks you out? No!

What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

What's wonderful about babies? They will die sooner or later....All Of Them

What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German strand on an island. Searching the jungle, they fall into a trap. They get painfully killed and eaten by the cannibals.

Simon says; "You're adopted."

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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