How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at poetry show me your tits

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

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Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

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Q: Why were the two elephants kicked off the beach? A: They were both level 4 sex offenders.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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Sometimes, people ask me, "Do you always have to be so obnoxious?" And to that I reply, "I don't always, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis." Stay thirsty, my friends.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

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What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

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why did tom get HIV? He was raped by a giant scorpion

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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If you wanna hear a joke scroll down this page more

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So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

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There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

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Quizno's footlongs are four dollars...

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After Fighting Apollo creed. Rocky screams ADRIAN!!!! After 3 days of cardiac arrest he realises that ardian is a fregment on his imagination

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops