I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

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Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

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What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

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What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

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Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

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What is Justin Beiber's favorite pastime? According to his biography, it's reading science fiction novels

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

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Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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