Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

A horse walks into a bar the barkeeper asks 'Why the long face?' The horse, incapable of speaking English, walked around in a circle, excreated and left.

Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

i like cats

What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

What's wonderful about babies? They will die sooner or later....All Of Them

A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

Men's Rights

A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue.

How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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