What did the blind boy get for christmas? harry potter transcribed in braille so he could enjoy such a magical world like the rest of us

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

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Doctor, people always laught at me at work! :( What do you do for a living? I am a comedian...

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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Get in the car.

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Three men sit at a bar. A clown walks in, so the first man says, "Oh, what fresh hell is this?", gets up and leaves. Then a fairy flies in, so the second man says, "Aw, hell no!", gets up and leaves. So the third man was alone with the fairy and clown.

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Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

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Why is your face? Because.

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

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What is Justin Beiber's favorite pastime? According to his biography, it's reading science fiction novels

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An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Mexicans are like waffles

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Penis.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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