knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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Mexicans are like waffles

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

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Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

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69

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My dad drinks a lot Help Me

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Who has the biggest cock A rooster

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How many rednecks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

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There are two people in this world; people who finish their sentences and people who

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Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

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Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

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I grew up, if we cannot live for ourselves, we cannot live for others, remember how people admired us when in their presence, while mocking us behind our backs, most humans do nor respect those that do not rule with lies, false promises, all backed up by an army no amount of civilians can defeat. We lost because people got what they wanted, preferring false promises from all ranging from their Gods, to their politicians speaking about their Gods, promises of betterment as a result of war in the name of Gods, but we are not that people. The problem is, that I used to believe that all of humanity possessed the potential people you and I have, and realize now that when I began looking down at people, I began looking down at myself, considering us all equal to them. Red, we might be few, but we are worth far more than those we consider our equals, maybe it is time even we, sought to rule those that desire to be ruled, rather than to help them find their desired path, because their desired path, might always have been to be ruled.

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Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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