What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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Three men sit at a bar. A clown walks in, so the first man says, "Oh, what fresh hell is this?", gets up and leaves. Then a fairy flies in, so the second man says, "Aw, hell no!", gets up and leaves. So the third man was alone with the fairy and clown.

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Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

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Q: What do you call a guy that likes men? A: Gay.

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I am darkness, soon I shall rule the world, those of you that desire to serve me thumb this up, those of you that desire eternal fear beyond your imagination, thumb me down. Moral: Try thinking of me and thinking "he is crazy", in order to unlock the secrets behind spontaneous human combustion.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue Bitches Like U Belong In The Zoo

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How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

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This is a racist joke but who cares!? What is the difference between a black guy and a bag of shit? The bag I apologize to all my fellow black friends. -Lets go MEts

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

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Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

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What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

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It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

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Why Does God Hate Gays? He Doesent, God Does Not Exist.

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Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane over New York? The Pilot.

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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