Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

roses are red violets are blue your baby has down syndrome

Q: What do you call a guy that likes men? A: Gay.

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

Where does a homeless person live? No where

Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

Yo mama is so fat!

what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

If a rooster lays a brown egg on the south side of an Asian man's roof, which way would I turn at the intersection? Folderol, because laundry has no soul.

What's worse than the Broncos losing the Superbowl? Your iPhone not working anymore

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

Your mom's so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and foods with nutritional value!!!! Oh burn!!!!

What the black guy say to the Jew during the blizzard? I think it's snowing.

Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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