What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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Get in the car.

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

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HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

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What did Batman say to his parents? Nothing. They're dead. Idiot.

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What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

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A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Somewhere, sometime in the world a man leads his country prominently in an era of change. He makes beautiful and strong speeches to his people. He also kills millions of Jewish people. No seriously, he kills millions of people it's great.

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Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

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Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

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Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

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It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

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What's the difference between an elephant and I?Our mass.

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Q: What did William Wallace say to Beyonce after Taylor Swift's performance? A: Nothing, because William Wallace has been dead for some time now.

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Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

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What did the man say to his wife? We are both men. Apart from you.

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What do you call a blonde on the Moon? That depends on what her name is.

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Paige

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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Who has the biggest cock A rooster

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knock knock who's there? bell bell who? bellend

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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