Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.

Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

my president is black, my lambo's blue, $14,400,000,000,000 national debt

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

what would you do if Michael Jackson was drowning? he can't drown he's already dead

Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

Why did the Black man cross the street? To get to the other side.

JUSTIN BIEBER IS A FAG

what do you call a man in a hole Fill

How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

Why is your face? Because.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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