Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

Fags are gay.

Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

What's worse than the Broncos losing the Superbowl? Your iPhone not working anymore

Why did the black man rob a KFC? He was in a very difficult financial situation and was worried his kids would go homeless. After scouting various locations he found the security at a nearby KFC was non-existent.

Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

I believe that as long as we do not change, as we decide to believe in ourselves and use our strength and potential, all that is left, is to see which side fate favors. Maybe we are meant to survive trough our strength and belief in ourselves and each other, or maybe we are, or will eventually end up as the last people of our kind, and fade away from life, proving that those that trust in the corrupt, where better than us. Suddenly I feel so alone.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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