Why I the kid still at school? His mom was brutally run over by a car

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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What is funnier than this joke? Jokes with higher ratings.

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Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

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What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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Mexicans are like waffles

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

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whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

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What's black, white and red all over? A zebra carcass

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Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

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Two sausages were in a pan. One says "Wow it's hot in here!" the other says "OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE"

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Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

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69

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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What's worse than repeating holocaust jokes? Repeating the holocaust.

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what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

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JUSTIN BIEBER IS A FAG

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Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.

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What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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