Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

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What's wrong the a man who can't tell where he is, can't tell where he's going, and doesn't know how to use a map? Downs Syndrome

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Apple.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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what would you do if Michael Jackson was drowning? he can't drown he's already dead

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

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The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

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How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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Two sausages were in a pan. One says "Wow it's hot in here!" the other says "OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE"

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.

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A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

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Q: What do you call a guy that likes men? A: Gay.

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The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

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How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

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Q) You know how I know your gay A) Cuz your gay

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my president is black, my lambo's blue, $14,400,000,000,000 national debt

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a black man A pizza can feed a family of four

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HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

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Did you hear about the speed reader on top of the Twin towers? 90 stories 5 seconds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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