Why I the kid still at school? His mom was brutally run over by a car

Get in the car.

How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a nigga!

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

How many rednecks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three.

What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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