When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

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Apple.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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What is 6 plus 9? 15.

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What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

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Why did the moron jump through the window?

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How many hamburgers can a grizzly bear eat? Maybe 6.

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ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

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Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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What do you get when you cross and unicorn with a loaf of bread? Cantaloupe

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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What's black, white and red all over? A zebra carcass

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Doctor, people always laught at me at work! :( What do you do for a living? I am a comedian...

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obamas trench

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why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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