How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

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Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

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HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

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A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

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when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

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You should periodically review the most up-to-date version of the Terms of Service. Oh you.

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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whats black and looks like a bucket a black bucket

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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Get in the car.

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There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

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You copy and paster!

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How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

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What did Batman say to his parents? Nothing. They're dead. Idiot.

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Joe Paterno dosn't walk into a police station.-South Park

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Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

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Do you know what does Wikipedia says about Elton John ? It says that Sir Elton Hercules John, CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight; 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. He has worked with his songwriting partner Bernie Taupin since 1967; they have collaborated on more than 30 albums to date.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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