An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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I hate being bi-polar; it's awesome!

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

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What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

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Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

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a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

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How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

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What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

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A woman's opinion

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Get in the car.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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Test

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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cats are afraid of dogs. mice are afraid of cats. elephants are afraid of mice. bf-2 fighter jets are afraid of elephants. is this true?

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A man called his dentist and asked when he should make an appointment. The dentist told him to come in around two thirty pm because that's when the next appointment was available.

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69

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Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

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what is brown and shaped like a tree?

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What do you call a black guy in college? A student.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops