Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

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why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

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Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

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roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

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Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

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An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

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Mexicans are like waffles

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ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

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It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

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What's worse than repeating holocaust jokes? Repeating the holocaust.

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Get in the car.

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What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

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69

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

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Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

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What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

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When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

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Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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