Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

4 is half the number 8 is.

Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

How do you call a black man? By his first name.

The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

What's the easiest way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

A baby seal walked into a club.

Yo mama is so fat!

400 asian people walked in a bar

69

What's worse than ten dead babies? Not much.

Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

Hi

What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

Apple.

How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

A teenage girl walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic drink. The bartender declines the order as she is under the legal age of purchasing and consuming alcohol.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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