How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

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Doctor, people always laught at me at work! :( What do you do for a living? I am a comedian...

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Apple.

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

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roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

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What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

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What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

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Mexicans are like waffles

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Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Penis.

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69

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What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

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Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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