what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

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The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

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roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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Mexicans are like waffles

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Bob fell off his roof.

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Doctor, people always laught at me at work! :( What do you do for a living? I am a comedian...

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Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

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There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

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ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

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Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane over New York? The Pilot.

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The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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There are two people in this world; people who finish their sentences and people who

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whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

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ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

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Penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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