What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

knock knock who's there? bell bell who? bellend

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the farmer cross the road? To pick up the dead chicken

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? If you eat a Jew, you're deemed a cannibal and are frowned upon by the majority of society.

Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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