A baby seal walked into a club.

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Why did the moron jump through the window?

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Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

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A homeless man comes home from work.

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Do you know what does Wikipedia says about Elton John ? It says that Sir Elton Hercules John, CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight; 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. He has worked with his songwriting partner Bernie Taupin since 1967; they have collaborated on more than 30 albums to date.

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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Apple.

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What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

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What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

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What did Batman say to his parents? Nothing. They're dead. Idiot.

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I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

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My Friday was going great until i realized it's Thursday...

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Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

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ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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Why were the floors of the movie theaters so sticky? Spilled beverages.

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You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

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What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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What's worse than ten dead babies? Not much.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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