knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

Why did the moron jump through the window?

ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

Who has the biggest cock A rooster

What did the little orphan boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he had died six months prior to Christmas due to the horrible living conditions of the orphanage.

385

An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

Like CHUCK NORRIS, CHUCK NORRIS like You !

Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

What's worse than the Broncos losing the Superbowl? Your iPhone not working anymore

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

^that joke's not funny

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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