Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? If you eat a Jew, you're deemed a cannibal and are frowned upon by the majority of society.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you get when you cross and unicorn with a loaf of bread? Cantaloupe

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

JUSTIN BIEBER IS A FAG

thumb_up thumb_down -3

1,984

thumb_up thumb_down -3

The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

thumb_up thumb_down -43

A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

thumb_up thumb_down -71

Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

thumb_up thumb_down -177

An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

thumb_up thumb_down +42

When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops