I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

My Friday was going great until i realized it's Thursday...

Knock Knock? Who's their. M. M who? Me.

A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

Why is your face? Because.

Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is black.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

knock knock who's there? bell bell who? bellend

What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

?"what's up" "A preposition"

What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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