What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

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Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

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A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

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A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

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Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

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one day a grape was in the sun raisin

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A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

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-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

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What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

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What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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1,984

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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