Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

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How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

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What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

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What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

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Adam said to God, "God, I need a companion." God replied, "OK Adam, but you need to give up a rib." Adam agreed and thus humanity was born.

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This is my firstever post so I wanted to make it very specialand have it really mean something, then I though fark that for a joke

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what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

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Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

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A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

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Why did the man get off the bus? Penis

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A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

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ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

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What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

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lol

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agp

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Want to hear the best joke ever? Me too.

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What's green and fuzzy and would hurt a lot if it fell out of a tree and hit you? A pool table

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

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You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

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Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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