Want to hear the best joke ever? Me too.

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what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

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What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

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What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

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Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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Once upon a time, your face.

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Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

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What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Ever hear the joke about the black guy going to jail its not a joke.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

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Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

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Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

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Why did the man get off the bus? Penis

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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What's white and hides behind a tree? Shy milk.

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

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Yo mama so stupid she tried to drown a dog and was quite successful at it. Know she serves a death sentence.

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Grandma walked into the kitchen...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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