Hi

Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

Women's rights.

BALL SO HARD... That I got kicked off the team for intentionally fouling other players whenever I got on the court, I'm sorry

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

Why was the Blonde Crying? -because she had just witnessed her infant get sucked through a jet engine and was very sad.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

who drinks pee? katness

Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

What's tastier than a dead baby? An orphaned dead baby.

wat?

Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

JFK

Im ashamed of being from Canada

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? It's a spicy sort of stew, you'd enjoy it.

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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