What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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2 women were sitting quietly.

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what's worse than getting an unwarranted parking ticket? Serving a life sentence for killing the meter man.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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Yo mamma so fat, she probably has Type Two Diabetes - which is often associated with obesity - and should seek medical advice.

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who drinks pee? katness

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Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

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what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

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How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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Adam said to God, "God, I need a companion." God replied, "OK Adam, but you need to give up a rib." Adam agreed and thus humanity was born.

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Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

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Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

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Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others don't

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Why did the man cross the road? Because that it where his friend Bob lives.

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A black man, a Jew and a Hispanic man walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hello. What could I get for you?" The black man had a Manhattan. The Hispanic man had a Bloody Mary. The Jew merely had water, as his religion forbids alcohol. The trio enjoy their drinks and then exit the establishment.

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What happens when you put a squid in the microwave? It dies.

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Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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