A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

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How did the Jew escape being put in the gas chamber? He killed himself.

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Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

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Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

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A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

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Poop

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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Knock Knock Who's There? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget.

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why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

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yeah..

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Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

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whats worse that 3 black guys dieing in a train accident .... one was ur brother the other was gay

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What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

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Roses are red Violets are blue (not really) I have Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

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Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

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what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

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What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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