What's worse than getting kicked by a horse? Drowning.

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Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

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An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

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Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

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whats worse that 3 black guys dieing in a train accident .... one was ur brother the other was gay

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knock knock whos there not me

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Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

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yeah..

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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who drinks pee? katness

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How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

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What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops