What's faster than a black guy with your TV? Probably someone who doesn't have to carry such a heavy object.

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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Get me a sandwich, bitch

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

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How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

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knock knock whos there not me

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Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

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A black man, a Jew and a Hispanic man walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hello. What could I get for you?" The black man had a Manhattan. The Hispanic man had a Bloody Mary. The Jew merely had water, as his religion forbids alcohol. The trio enjoy their drinks and then exit the establishment.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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Knock Knock Who's There? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget.

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

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What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

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why do pedo's molest children? because it feels really good.

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lol

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I'm so hungry I could eat food

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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