Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? He received many presents because his parents loved him very much.

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Jews.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Im ashamed of being from Canada

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

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Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

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What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

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hi

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What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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