What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

whats worse that 3 black guys dieing in a train accident .... one was ur brother the other was gay

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

knock knock whos there not me

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others don't

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

Women's rights.

What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

who drinks pee? katness

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

Roses are red Violets are blue (not really) I have Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

lol

Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

yeah..

What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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