What happens when you put a squid in the microwave? It dies.

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Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? It's a spicy sort of stew, you'd enjoy it.

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Why did susy give up in the corner? Cause she couldnt fight off the black man.

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Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, this joke sucks.

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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What's older than history? Pre-history.

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Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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what's worse than getting an unwarranted parking ticket? Serving a life sentence for killing the meter man.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mum. Oh hi mum, the doors unlocked

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

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What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

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Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

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knock knock whos there not me

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

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Get me a sandwich, bitch

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Why did the boy eat the potato? I don't know. Neather do I. :(

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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