Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

what do you call a man that looks like will ferrel? jim

what's worse than getting an unwarranted parking ticket? Serving a life sentence for killing the meter man.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

the Holocaust. Because anything involving the Holocaust is automatically an anti joke. the Holocaust wasn't funny.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

Get me a sandwich, bitch

Why did the boy eat the potato? I don't know. Neather do I. :(

What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder lately? No? Neither has he.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

Knock knock! Who's there? Your mum. Oh hi mum, the doors unlocked

What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

Why does Brianne cry? Because she has no family.

What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...