No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

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how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

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How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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what do you call a man that looks like will ferrel? jim

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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Jews.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

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Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

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Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

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A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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What's older than history? Pre-history.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

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Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

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Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

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What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? It's a spicy sort of stew, you'd enjoy it.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mum. Oh hi mum, the doors unlocked

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the Holocaust. Because anything involving the Holocaust is automatically an anti joke. the Holocaust wasn't funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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