What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

whats worse that 3 black guys dieing in a train accident .... one was ur brother the other was gay

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

thumb_up thumb_down +120

what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Grandma walked into the kitchen...

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

thumb_up thumb_down -110

Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +121

agp

thumb_up thumb_down +103

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Wherever you left it

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops