Hello penis

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What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

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What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

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What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's me Ok, come in (the knockers voice was familiar enough that giving a name would have been out of place)

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what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

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Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

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Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

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What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

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Barack Obama.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

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My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

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Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

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Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

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Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

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Why i Hate people. They are alive. The are breathing. The are near me.

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What's brown, liquid and bad for your health in large doses? Did you guess: Coca Cola? Soda? Beer? Pepsi? Wrong. It's beer. Did this Anti-joke sound pretentious? Don't worry, you're not the only one.

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What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

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Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

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What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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