Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

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Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

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Q: What does 'A' stand for? A: Effort

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

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Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

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Want to hear the best joke ever? Me too.

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Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

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two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, this joke sucks.

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whats worse that 3 black guys dieing in a train accident .... one was ur brother the other was gay

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Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

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Two girls are sitting quietly.

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What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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I'm so hungry I could eat food

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What's the square root of four? Two.

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roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

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I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

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the Holocaust. Because anything involving the Holocaust is automatically an anti joke. the Holocaust wasn't funny.

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why didn't the drug addict take steroids? he was going to but died due to years of substance abuse

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How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops