Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Poop

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lol

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What's the difference between a black man and a pile of shit ? One is a black man, the other is a pile of shit.

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Im ashamed of being from Canada

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Jews.

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9/11

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

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Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

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A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

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How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

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What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

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A black man, a Jew and a Hispanic man walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hello. What could I get for you?" The black man had a Manhattan. The Hispanic man had a Bloody Mary. The Jew merely had water, as his religion forbids alcohol. The trio enjoy their drinks and then exit the establishment.

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Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

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Knock Knock Who's There? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget.

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What's white and sticky? Glue.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops