Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -49

lol

thumb_up thumb_down -115

Im ashamed of being from Canada

thumb_up thumb_down -167

Knock Knock Who's There? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Poop

thumb_up thumb_down -64

What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

thumb_up thumb_down -66

What's the difference between a black man and a pile of shit ? One is a black man, the other is a pile of shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -142

Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +119

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops