How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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Yeah Aodhans been typing up everything strting argument along with taggart

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What did jell say to the carriage driver from Uzbekistan that was underpaid and had no banter? Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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yeah..

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the Holocaust. Because anything involving the Holocaust is automatically an anti joke. the Holocaust wasn't funny.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue Goldfish

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Women's rights.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? It's a spicy sort of stew, you'd enjoy it.

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Q: What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A: A blue plastic bag in the wind.

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what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

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Why does Brianne cry? Because she has no family.

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face? The man replies "i have a huge malignant tumor in my chin"

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how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

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What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

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Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

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Why did the goblin have no friends? because no one likes a goblin, including other goblins.

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What is the difference between a pizza and the Jews? The pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

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What did the mime say when he met the clown. Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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