What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

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Theres a black a guy and a mexican in a car, whos driving? The black guy, they are best friends and happen to both be neurosurgeons.

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He still lives there.

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BALL SO HARD... That I got kicked off the team for intentionally fouling other players whenever I got on the court, I'm sorry

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Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

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Jews.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

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Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

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JFK

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Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

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What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

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I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

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You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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