How do you make a Trucker cry? Kill his family and chop of his arms.

An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

Yo momma is SO black.

Why did the man cross the road? Because that it where his friend Bob lives.

What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

What happens when you put a squid in the microwave? It dies.

why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

i am a dwarf i have a big nose im a ranga nice to meet you julia

roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

What is the difference between a pizza and the Jews? The pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

What do you get if you cross a Black Man with a Knife? Stabbed.

Fine, you got me there, I have already made sure that you get your compensation, it is the least thing I can do you let me know if anyone claiming to be part of my order bothers you again, I promise I will personally enforce strict guidelines in order to ensure that such a thing never happens again. I hope you will trust me, I will no longer call it the Order of Nero, but as you know we cannot reveal the true name of our order. I also agree to meet you in person so we can further discuss this impeding situation which I will give top priority. Truth is Nero, that I used to be one of your co workers in the underground, and my attempts at saving what is left might not be as ideal as the goals we are set to achieve are, we simply cannot expect that people excel at greatness at the first go. Of course this grave incident is not even near a "mere lack of greatness" but rather a group of people that yes, sadly have rightfully claimed to be members of our society, yet I need you to come to terms that this was a huge oversight in my vision for a new and "improved" underground society, and not a intentional attack at you and your personal security. I submit to your demands, and I ask that you partake in a small number of meetings where we can all discuss and further develop the necessary guidelines required to further solidify our foundation.

Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

what did the poor kid get from santa? Nothing santa hates poor kid, but the rich kid got a very nice convertable.

Women's rights.

What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

9/11

Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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