What did one narwhal say to another Hi ;)

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating at night? A: Yell "DROP IT NIGGAH!" Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating in the day time? A: Run away cause your house is haunted.

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Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

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A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Whoevers at the door you should probably go answer it.

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Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

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Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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the Holocaust. Because anything involving the Holocaust is automatically an anti joke. the Holocaust wasn't funny.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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hi

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He still lives there.

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Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

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What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

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Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

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What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops