How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

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Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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Two girls are sitting quietly.

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

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A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

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What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

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Paperclip... BANANA?!

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how many people can you eat? well, im not canniballistic, so none unless i was starving.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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Theres a black a guy and a mexican in a car, whos driving? The black guy, they are best friends and happen to both be neurosurgeons.

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What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

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There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

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Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

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how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

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WHO IS A CHIKEN???????????? I AM do you got a problem with that!!!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops