Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

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A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

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What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

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Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

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Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

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BALL SO HARD... That I got kicked off the team for intentionally fouling other players whenever I got on the court, I'm sorry

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Why was the Blonde Crying? -because she had just witnessed her infant get sucked through a jet engine and was very sad.

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What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

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The 80's

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

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Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

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hi

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Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

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69

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Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

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Q: What do you call a car full of black people? A: Stolen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops