how many people can you eat? well, im not canniballistic, so none unless i was starving.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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What did the mime say when he met the clown. Nothing.

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Theres a black a guy and a mexican in a car, whos driving? The black guy, they are best friends and happen to both be neurosurgeons.

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What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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Q: a blonde, a brunette, and redhead jump off a cliff, which one hits the ground first? A: Most likely the one that weighs more

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Your mom walks into a bar.

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What's older than history? Pre-history.

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WHO IS A CHIKEN???????????? I AM do you got a problem with that!!!!!!

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Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

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Why did a young boy fall off a building? Gravity.

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Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

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Q: What do you call a pakistani that practices medice? A: Doctor

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Once upon a time, your face.

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Why does Brianne cry? Because she has no family.

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What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

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Seen the new batman movie? [spoiler] the audience dies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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