Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

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What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

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The 80's

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Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

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Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

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No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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Your mom walks into a bar.

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WHO IS A CHIKEN???????????? I AM do you got a problem with that!!!!!!

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Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

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A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

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how many people can you eat? well, im not canniballistic, so none unless i was starving.

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Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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Once upon a time, your face.

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Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating at night? A: Yell "DROP IT NIGGAH!" Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating in the day time? A: Run away cause your house is haunted.

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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I dont no the difference between their and there

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Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

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What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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