A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

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A black guy walks into a bar. When he saw the white bartender's bar he got offended. There were heads of hunted animals on the walls. He works for PETA.

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Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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What's older than history? Pre-history.

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why do pedo's molest children? because it feels really good.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He still lives there.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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The 80's

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Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

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There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

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What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

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Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating at night? A: Yell "DROP IT NIGGAH!" Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating in the day time? A: Run away cause your house is haunted.

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Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

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A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Whoevers at the door you should probably go answer it.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

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Why did a young boy fall off a building? Gravity.

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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