hi

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Why did the boy eat his bagel? He was hungry.

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A black man, a Jew and a Hispanic man walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hello. What could I get for you?" The black man had a Manhattan. The Hispanic man had a Bloody Mary. The Jew merely had water, as his religion forbids alcohol. The trio enjoy their drinks and then exit the establishment.

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I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

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why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

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A kid walked in to a bar, grabbed a napkin, and left

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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Paperclip... BANANA?!

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whats sixty-twelve and a half + one one sixty-twelve isn't a number

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"Knock Knock" "Who the hell is it?" "Patri..." "Go the hell away!"

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If life gives you lemons, you shoud be thankful it didn't give you AIDS.

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What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

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What did the stop sign say to the no smoking sign? Stop

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Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

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Ever hear the joke about the black guy going to jail its not a joke.

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Get the FREE anti jokes app with loads and loads of anti jokes anywhere you go, even offline! All the funniest and most popular, and loads more new ones. Why not? After all, it's free! http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/hilarious-anti-jokes-lite/id438092279?mt=8&ls=1

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Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

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Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

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Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

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I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

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What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

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Why was young Timmy crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops