A black guy walks into a bar. When he saw the white bartender's bar he got offended. There were heads of hunted animals on the walls. He works for PETA.

Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

Paperclip... BANANA?!

Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

How do you fit 6000000 jews into a car? 1 in the front, 1 in the back and the rest in the ashtray.

what did the poor kid get from santa? Nothing santa hates poor kid, but the rich kid got a very nice convertable.

A blond was driving her car one day when "Party in the USA" came one the radio. She put her hands up; however, she realized she had to keep control of the car. She put one hand back on the steering wheel and arrived to her destination safely.

why did the internet crash? it didn't

Women's rights.

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

yeah..

what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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