A kid falls off a cliff and dies. Who cleans them up? A bear.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

Miss Polly had a Dolly who was sick sick sick So she called for the Doctor to come quick quick quick The doctor came with his bag and his hat And he knocked on the door with a rat-tat-tat. He looked at Polly's Dolly and he shook his head. He said she had leprosy and must have all her limbs amputated.

knock knock your nana had a cardiac arrest and thankfull dead now

Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

Why didn't Joe's toaster work anymore? Because he dropped it into the bathtub with him.

What's older than history? Pre-history.

"Lack of sleep" is that like... Sleep deprivation?

Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

2 women were sitting quietly.

Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: slightly aged post it note glue

Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

Why was the fish disappointed with his grades? They were all below C-level!

hi

Why did the boy eat his bagel? He was hungry.

A black man, a Jew and a Hispanic man walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hello. What could I get for you?" The black man had a Manhattan. The Hispanic man had a Bloody Mary. The Jew merely had water, as his religion forbids alcohol. The trio enjoy their drinks and then exit the establishment.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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