Paperclip... BANANA?!

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What is it called when your friend tells you that Justin Beiber was laid? Lying.

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Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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A black guy walks into a bar. When he saw the white bartender's bar he got offended. There were heads of hunted animals on the walls. He works for PETA.

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finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

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An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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My brother found snow in his hair from last year... only people who know me know this joke!!haha -sopie

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Why was the little boy sad? Cause his mum died of a terminal illness. Why was the little girl sad? Cause she was his sibling.

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Haikus are rigid, Their structure gives them beauty, And if you ignore the structure they kind of don't make sense and are bad.

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A blond was driving her car one day when "Party in the USA" came one the radio. She put her hands up; however, she realized she had to keep control of the car. She put one hand back on the steering wheel and arrived to her destination safely.

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9/11

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a man died

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Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating at night? A: Yell "DROP IT NIGGAH!" Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating in the day time? A: Run away cause your house is haunted.

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What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

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Q.why did the car crash? A.becaus eit was drivin by a sack of potatos.

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whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

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what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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