Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

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William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

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Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

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Fine, you got me there, I have already made sure that you get your compensation, it is the least thing I can do you let me know if anyone claiming to be part of my order bothers you again, I promise I will personally enforce strict guidelines in order to ensure that such a thing never happens again. I hope you will trust me, I will no longer call it the Order of Nero, but as you know we cannot reveal the true name of our order. I also agree to meet you in person so we can further discuss this impeding situation which I will give top priority. Truth is Nero, that I used to be one of your co workers in the underground, and my attempts at saving what is left might not be as ideal as the goals we are set to achieve are, we simply cannot expect that people excel at greatness at the first go. Of course this grave incident is not even near a "mere lack of greatness" but rather a group of people that yes, sadly have rightfully claimed to be members of our society, yet I need you to come to terms that this was a huge oversight in my vision for a new and "improved" underground society, and not a intentional attack at you and your personal security. I submit to your demands, and I ask that you partake in a small number of meetings where we can all discuss and further develop the necessary guidelines required to further solidify our foundation.

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Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

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Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

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Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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Paperclip... BANANA?!

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what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

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Q: What does 'A' stand for? A: Effort

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Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

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what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

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What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

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I dont no the difference between their and there

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My brother found snow in his hair from last year... only people who know me know this joke!!haha -sopie

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A blond was driving her car one day when "Party in the USA" came one the radio. She put her hands up; however, she realized she had to keep control of the car. She put one hand back on the steering wheel and arrived to her destination safely.

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why did the internet crash? it didn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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